Friday
August 29, 2014

Life on Life's Terms

Uncritical thinking

"I wasn't drunk," Smiley said.

"What was your BAC?" I asked.

"The cop said it was .13, but I wasn't drunk."

"You are legally drunk at .08," I reminded him.

"I wasn't .13 and I wasn't drunk," he said.  "The cop was wrong."

"Did you have a blood test?"

"I made them take me to an ER to get my blood tested.  They were wrong too.  They said it was .12.  It'll all work out when they admit they were wrong."

I knew from experience there was no point in arguing with Smiley.  In Smiley's world, reality was whatever Smiley said it was.  Critical thinking wasn't his strong suit.

Suddenly I was very grateful for anyone who had challenged my thinking, who made me consider other points of view, or just saw the world differently.  They had made me think about the way I thought about things.

Today I will be grateful for all the people who taught me to think critically.

Life on Life's Terms (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Upcoming

Burnout: Clinical, Ethical, & Supervisory Issues
September 12, 2014 at Greenbriar-New Kensington
9:30 a.m. to 12:45 p.m
$30 payable in advance, at the door, or by invoice after the training

This three hour training is accredited for:

• Addiction Counselors by the Pa. Certification Board
• CRCs  by the Commission on Rehabilitation Counselor Certification # 11938191652 and 11938191653 (one hour Ethics portion)
• Counselors by NAADAC #477 and NBCC #6352
• EAPs by the Employee Assistance Certification Commission
• Social Workers by the University of Pittsburgh School of Social Work.

Other Blogs

AArdvarks, a daily messages blog about a group of young people in recovery can be found at: https://www.goodreads.com/author_blog_posts/6902297-twisting.

Smart Bears, Angry Rats

Cliché today

"What about Brown and Grey?" my son asked.

"They lived four more years in the wild," I said.  "It was the happiest time of their lives."

"Four years!  That’s it?"

"Four years is a long time for a mouse.  And they made the most of every day."

"Oh Brother!  That is so cliché. Make the most of every day 'cause life is short."

"Most clichés have more than a grain of truth to them."

Cliché as it sounds, I will try to get the most out of today.

Smart Bears, Angry Rats (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Thursday
August 28, 2014

Life on Life's Terms

In an instant

I wasn't surprised seeing Julie back in treatment.  Seeing Smiley shocked me.  Smiley was nicknamed "Smiley" for being so happily sober – clueless – but happy and sober.

"Smiley, what happened?" I asked.  "You had three years sober."

"I shouldn't be here.  David from AA sold me out."

"Smiley, what happened?" I asked again.

"I did him a favor watching his dog, Celly.  When I went looking for Celly's treats, I found a giant bottle of vanilla extract.  David sold me out."

"Smiley," I said, "please tell me how you got here."

"I tasted the extract, and really liked it.  So, I made myself a glass of vanilla milk.  I didn't know it had alcohol."

"Smiley, you're an FDA chemist!  You know what's in everything.  Cut the crap and tell me what happened."

"Sheesh Ken, relax!  When David got home he accused me of being drunk.  He offered to drive me home.  I told him I wasn't drunk, but he threatened to call the police if I drove."

"Why didn't he just take your keys?"

"Because I found his gun hidden in the cabinet over his microwave.  Do you know what he did when I left?"

"He called the police," I said.

"He sold me out.  He called the police.  Now I've got some trumped up gun charges, and a bogus DUI."

I was amazed at how far and how fast Smiley had fallen.  Bye, bye career with a federal agency.  Hello potential felony conviction and loss of driving privileges.  He was living an insurance company ad showing how a disaster changes someone's life in an instant.  Smiley's instant started when he tasted the extract.

Today I will be grateful for all the instant catastrophes I've avoided.

Life on Life's Terms (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Upcoming

Burnout: Clinical, Ethical, & Supervisory Issues
September 12, 2014 at Greenbriar-New Kensington
9:30 a.m. to 12:45 p.m
$30 payable in advance, at the door, or by invoice after the training

This three hour training is accredited for:

• Addiction Counselors by the Pa. Certification Board
• CRCs  by the Commission on Rehabilitation Counselor Certification # 11938191652 and 11938191653 (one hour Ethics portion)
• Counselors by NAADAC #477 and NBCC #6352
• EAPs by the Employee Assistance Certification Commission
• Social Workers by the University of Pittsburgh School of Social Work.

Other Blogs

AArdvarks, a daily messages blog about a group of young people in recovery can be found at: https://www.goodreads.com/author_blog_posts/6895618-rope-tricks.

Smart Bears, Angry Rats

Room for one more?  75 Years from now

The Caller had literally kicked Sammy's cat into the street.   A week later, bruised, tired, and starving, the cat collapsed in the bushes of Apple Tree Park, between the pickle ball courts and the soccer fields. 

Most of the Trevoors, a family of eight, were watching Mary and Melvin Trevoor play their very first soccer game.  Two of the other four children were catching grasshoppers when they stumbled upon the cat.

"We have three dogs, an iguana, and a rabbit," Mr. Trevoor said.  "We don't need another animal."

"Absolutely Freakin' NOT!" Mrs. Trevoor said.

Sammy's cat, whom the Trevoors named "Skinny," lived with them for five years before he died peacefully in his sleep.

Today I will applaud the people who always make room for one more.

Smart Bears, Angry Rats (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Wednesday
August 27, 2014

Life on Life's Terms

Karmic avalanche

When I walked into the building the next morning, The Other Ken was talking to Julie.  I walked past them, stopping at Patty the Office Manager Who Really Runs the Site's office.

"Julie's coming back into treatment," Patty said, shaking her head in amazement.

"What happened?  Musta been something big."

"That's just it," Patty said.  "Nothing bad happened from this relapse.  Julie's scared to death thinking something bad should have happened." 

"You lost me," I said.

"Julie thinks the Universe is waiting to spring something horrible on her.  She says a 'karmic avalanche' is coming her way because of all the things she got away with during this binge."

"And she wants to be sober to deal with whatever karma has in store?" I asked.

"Exactly."

"Glad she's back safe, whatever the reason."

Today I will be grateful for whatever brings me to safe places. 

Life on Life's Terms (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Upcoming

Burnout: Clinical, Ethical, & Supervisory Issues
September 12, 2014 at Greenbriar-New Kensington
9:30 a.m. to 12:45 p.m
$30 payable in advance, at the door, or by invoice after the training

This three hour training is accredited for:

• Addiction Counselors by the Pa. Certification Board
• CRCs  by the Commission on Rehabilitation Counselor Certification # 11938191652 and 11938191653 (one hour Ethics portion)
• Counselors by NAADAC #477 and NBCC #6352
• EAPs by the Employee Assistance Certification Commission
• Social Workers by the University of Pittsburgh School of Social Work.

Other Blogs

AArdvarks, a daily messages blog about a group of young people in recovery can be found at: https://www.goodreads.com/author_blog_posts/6889279-autonomy.

Smart Bears, Angry Rats

"Ask not for whom the bell tolls," John Donne   75 Years from now

Two days later, right after Sammy ingested the purest Lil' Bit he could have imagined, he OD'd.  Whatever insight he'd had about the cure for cancer died with him.  The Caller was infuriated.  He had Sammy's body thrown down a mine shaft.  A young rat, just a little smarter and meaner than the rest, found the body first. 

T'Cell wasted years looking for his father, convinced he was still alive. 

Today I'll remember what the poet said:  no man is an island, one man's death diminishes us all.

Smart Bears, Angry Rats (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Tuesday
August 26, 2014

Life on Life's Terms

Titles

"Whatcha smiling about?" my wife asked.

"Thinking about Andrew's wedding," I said.  My wife hadn't been able to attend my nephew's wedding with me.

"I'd be smiling about that wedding too if somebody had remembered to take more than two pictures," she said, poking me in the chest. "What's lighting up your memory?"

"Right before they played a hymn the minister said, "This is the favorite hymn of Andrew's beloved Pop-Pop."  Everyone turned to smile at him – his children, his grandchildren, and his great-grandchildren."

"He's a sweet, sweet, man."

"He is.  But I was smiling because I thought he had earned that title, 'beloved.'  And of all the titles people chase, that may be the most meaningful."

Today I will consider what titles mean, and which ones are worth chasing.

Life on Life's Terms (c) 2014 Ken Montrose

Upcoming

Burnout: Clinical, Ethical, & Supervisory Issues
September 12, 2014 at Greenbriar-New Kensington
9:30 a.m. to 12:45 p.m
$30 payable in advance, at the door, or by invoice after the training

This three hour training is accredited for:

• Addiction Counselors by the Pa. Certification Board
• CRCs  by the Commission on Rehabilitation Counselor Certification # 11938191652 and 11938191653 (one hour Ethics portion)
• Counselors by NAADAC #477 and NBCC #6352
• EAPs by the Employee Assistance Certification Commission
• Social Workers by the University of Pittsburgh School of Social Work.

Other Blogs

AArdvarks, a daily messages blog about a group of young people in recovery can be found at: https://www.goodreads.com/author_blog_posts/6881717-h-a-l-t.

Smart Bears, Angry Rats

A moment of clarity  75 Years from now

As Sammy packed up his belongings, he found an old notebook.  Early in his career he had often put up two ideas side by side on the iWall.  Then he'd sit in front of the iWall with an old fashioned notebook and pencil, jotting down random thoughts about the two ideas.  More than once this strategy had given him new directions, or at least eliminated one of the ideas from further pursuit.

Sammy vaguely remembered a particular notebook entry.  The two ideas had seemed at odds.  He recalled staring at those ideas for days, knowing some insight was just beyond his grasp.  He found that page in his notebook and read his notes.  That's when he had that moment of clarity that had eluded him ten years earlier.   

"I know where the cure lies," he said to himself.  Despite the damage done to his brain by Lil' Bit, he knew he'd been given an amazing gift.  "Thank you," he said aloud to a God he wasn't sure he believed in.

Today I will be grateful for those moments of clarity, they are truly a gift.

Smart Bears, Angry Rats (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Monday
AUGUST 25, 2014

Life on Life's Terms

Do as I say, not as I do

The next morning my daughter was up early, doing homework.

"Why didn't you do that last night?" I asked.

"I knew I could do it today," she said. "I'll finish it in homeroom."

"Didn't we have a talk just last week about procrastination?"

"I know.  But if you drive me to school, I can do it before homeroom."

"I'd like to, but I have to get to work to write today's message.  I try to send them out before nine o'clock."

She stared at me for a second, letting the hypocrisy sink in.

"Why didn't you write it last night, Dad?" she said, trying to sound like me.  Nothing but lame excuses popped into my mind.

"Grab your backpack," I said. "I'll drive you to school."

Today I'll be on guard for my own hypocrisy.

Life on Life's Terms (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Upcoming

Burnout: Clinical, Ethical, & Supervisory Issues
September 12, 2014 at Greenbriar-New Kensington
9:30 a.m. to 12:45 p.m
$30 payable in advance, at the door, or by invoice after the training

This three hour training is accredited for:

• Addiction Counselors by the Pa. Certification Board
• CRCs  by the Commission on Rehabilitation Counselor Certification # 11938191652 and 11938191653 (one hour Ethics portion)
• Counselors by NAADAC #477 and NBCC #6352
• EAPs by the Employee Assistance Certification Commission
• Social Workers by the University of Pittsburgh School of Social Work.

Other Blogs

AArdvarks, a daily messages blog about a group of young people in recovery can be found at: https://www.goodreads.com/author_blog_posts/6876579-pickled.

Smart Bears, Angry Rats

High Standards

"Why does she have to clean her room?" my son asked as he peered in from the hallway.

"Look at it!" I said.

He looked around the room and shrugged.  "Just looks like somebody kicked the clean clothes onto the dirty clothes pile. Take the half-folded stuff that’s clean off the completely rumpled pile, and it's all good."

"That's your standard?" I asked.  "If the clean clothes are separated from the dirty clothes, then you consider the room clean?"

"Well, you'd have to be some kinda slob to wear clothes that were sitting on the dirty pile," he said looking to his sister.

"Brat Boy's right.  The standard is no mingling of the clean with the dirty. Neither one of us would ever violate that standard."

I thought about discussing the importance of having high standards, but decided not to waste my breath.  "Clean your rooms," I said.  "And before you ask why, the answer is because I said so."

"Somebody has some mighty low standards for explaining why we should do things," my son said.  He caught my expression and said to his sister, "But now would be a good time for us to clean our rooms, Blondie."

Today I will set a slightly higher standard for myself.

Smart Bears, Angry Rats (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Friday
August 22, 2014

Life on Life's Terms

Imaginary trains
     I was lying in bed, my eyes shut, my head moving slightly from side to side.  My wife walked into the room.
    "Your head is swaying," she said.  "Why is your head swaying?"
    "You'll laugh," I said.
    "Probably, but tell me any way."
    "When I can't sleep, I pretend I'm on a troop train coming back from the trenches at the end of World War I.  I've survived the war, and I'm going home.  My head is swaying with the movement of the train.  I imagine the celebrations have died down and the train is quiet.  We are headed for the coast to catch a ship bound for New York.  I picture you and the kids waiting for me at the dock in New York.  You're stunningly beautiful in your long dress, the kids are smiling and laughing. My heart aches to see you all again."      I waited for her to laugh.  She didn't. I added, "Imagining I'm on that train chases away whatever thoughts are keeping me up."
    "I love your imagination and I love you," she said.

Today I will put my imagination to good use.

Life on Life's Terms (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Upcoming

Burnout: Clinical, Ethical, & Supervisory Issues
September 12, 2014 at Greenbriar-New Kensington
9:30 a.m. to 12:45 p.m
$30 payable in advance, at the door, or by invoice after the training

This three hour training is accredited for:

• Addiction Counselors by the Pa. Certification Board
• CRCs  by the Commission on Rehabilitation Counselor Certification # 11938191652 and 11938191653 (one hour Ethics portion)
• Counselors by NAADAC #477 and NBCC #6352
• EAPs by the Employee Assistance Certification Commission
• Social Workers by the University of Pittsburgh School of Social Work.

Other Blogs

AArdvarks, a daily messages blog about a group of young people in recovery can be found at: https://www.goodreads.com/author_blog_posts/6860899-insanity.

Smart Bears, Angry Rats

Pushed, a little

 When I was done writing for the day, I went upstairs to my daughter's room.  A pair of dark eyes peered at me from under a crumpled blanket at the foot of the bed.  I hoped they belonged to the dog.  I pushed a pile of clothes out of my way with my foot.

"Dad!" my daughter yelped, "You knocked the clean pile into the dirty pile!"

"Sorry. I wanted to thank you for pushing me to write this story.  Writing encouraging things about a dark future has been a real challenge, but I like how it makes me think about what might be.  I'm more in touch with my responsibility to future generations."

"Happy to help, Daddy."

"How about you accept a challenge?  How about you clean this room?"

"Tsk, tsk.  Poor delusional Daddy.  It's only a challenge if it's possible.  Attempting the impossible, like pushing over a building with your bare hands or cleaning this room, just sets you up for failure.  I know you love me too much to want me to fail. Think what it would do to my self-esteem.  Trying to clean this room might set me on a path that ends with me living in the basement with my unemployed, ex-con husband."

"I'll take that chance," I said.  "Clean your room."

Today I will accept a challenge.  I'll do something a little difficult.

Smart Bears, Angry Rats (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Thursday
August 21, 2014

Life on Life's Terms

Eye of the storm

   She was at it again.  Blaming others on social media for the drama in her life.  Her previous posts fell into three categories.  How they were wrong.  How she was right.  How they had betrayed her.  She never seemed to see her role in any of the drama.

Today I will wonder if there's drama swirling all around me because I'm the center of the storm?

Life on Life's Terms (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Upcoming

Burnout: Clinical, Ethical, & Supervisory Issues
September 12, 2014 at Greenbriar-New Kensington
9:30 a.m. to 12:45 p.m
$30 payable in advance, at the door, or by invoice after the training

This three hour training is accredited for:

• Addiction Counselors by the Pa. Certification Board
• CRCs  by the Commission on Rehabilitation Counselor Certification # 11938191652 and 11938191653 (one hour Ethics portion)
• Counselors by NAADAC #477 and NBCC #6352
• EAPs by the Employee Assistance Certification Commission
• Social Workers by the University of Pittsburgh School of Social Work.

Other Blogs

 AArdvarks, a daily messages blog about a group of young people in recovery can be found at: https://www.goodreads.com/author_blog_posts/6857778-entomological-proctologist

Smart Bears, Angry Rats

The Devil You Say!   75 years from now

T Cell dropped by his father's office, hoping to surprise him.  He found his father packing up boxes under the glare of two security guards.

"What are you doing?" he asked his dad.

Sammy stared at him, wondering just how much he should tell the boy.  'He's not really a boy anymore,' Sammy thought.  'Time he knew the way the world works.'  "I'm changing labs."

"Why?" a dumbfounded T Cell asked.  

"I was willing to do whatever it takes to find the cure.  Ubutu was not.  Son, sometimes you have to stand your ground with rich and powerful people like Ubutu.  They'll plow you under if you let them."

T'cell knew his father and he knew a little about Ubutu.  He also knew b.s. when he heard it.  "C'mon Dad!  What's the real reason?"

"I told you the real reason.  Ubutu isn't willing to do what it takes.  I've found somebody who is."

T Cell stared at his father.  He noticed the dark circles under his eyes and goose pimples on his arms.  "You're doing Lil' Bit!  What the *&&^%$%  Dad!  Ubutu fired you because you're hooked on Lil' Bit.  That stuff is nasty. You get a virus, and your brain fries, and you don't sleep, and you die mumbling to yourself about how smart you are."

"Lil' Bit does make you smarter!  Lil' Bit is the key to finding the cure!  Besides, if Lil' Bit is as bad as you say, better to stick with it than to try something new that might be worse.  Better the devil you know."  

"Better no devil at all!" T Cell yelled.  He wanted to tell Sammy he didn't need something to make him smarter, but he knew his father couldn't hear him.

Better no devil than the devil you know.

Smart Bears, Angry Rats (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Wednesday

August 20, 2014

Life on Life's Terms

Admiration

Tucker, the most miserable human being I had ever encountered in AA, hit the lottery.  He won $100,000.  After taxes, his check came to $70,000. He spent $14,000 on a used truck and gave the rest to charity.  As much as I disliked Tucker, I had to admire generosity.  He wasn't a rich man, and he could have surely used that money. 

To my utter amazement, I was happy for him.  Not only was I happy for him, I was happy for me.  I had finally found something to like about him.  And for that, I was very grateful.

Today I will be grateful for qualities I admire in people I don't.

Life on Life's Terms (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Upcoming

Burnout: Clinical, Ethical, & Supervisory Issues
September 12, 2014 at Greenbriar-New Kensington
9:30 a.m. to 12:45 p.m
$30 payable in advance, at the door, or by invoice after the training

This three hour training is accredited for:

• Addiction Counselors by the Pa. Certification Board
• CRCs  by the Commission on Rehabilitation Counselor Certification # 11938191652 and 11938191653 (one hour Ethics portion)
• Counselors by NAADAC #477 and NBCC #6352
• EAPs by the Employee Assistance Certification Commission
• Social Workers by the University of Pittsburgh School of Social Work.

Other Blogs

 AArdvarks, a daily messages blog about a group of young people in recovery can be found at: https://www.goodreads.com/author_blog_posts/6849832-guilt

Smart Bears, Angry Rats

Acknowledgement 75 Years from now

Ubutu's plane was landing when Olsen pulled into the private hangar. Ubutu wasn't on the plane, but his wife Serena was. Olsen was to take her to meet Ubutu at the United Nations building in New York. When she got off the plane, she handed Olsen a small box .

"Thank you, but why?" Olsen asked. "Is this a wedding present?"

Serena laughed. "Are we at your wedding? No this is for keeping Ubutu safe."

"It's my job. You don't have to get me anything."

"You put your heart and soul into your job. I have seen you poring over your maps, studying the weather, reading the iWall, always looking for some hidden threat to Ubutu's safety."

Olsen unwrapped the package. Inside two cubes with the distinctive metallic rainbow of rare and precious metals rested in a velvet lining. Because these metals were scarce and vital to computer circuitry, they tended to double in price every ten years. The cubes were a gift and an investment. "I can't take this! It's too much."

"For your own safety, I suggest you accept my gift and stop arguing," Serena said, laughing. "Let me acknowledge your good work. Trust me, there will never be a shortage of people willing to point out your mistakes."

Today I will acknowledge someone else's good work.

Smart Bears, Angry Rats (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Tuesday
August 19, 2014

Life on Life's Terms

Too Well?
"How are things going otherwise?" I asked Kate.

"Too well."

"How can things be going too well?"

"I'm tired, but the people around me are bouncing off the walls happy for me.  My whole family is behind me.  My boss told me he'd hold my job for me.  My little one can't get enough of me.  She goes with me everywhere."

"Sounds great.  Why do you say it's going 'too well'?"

She started to cry.  "Because I never realized how wonderful they were.  You have no idea how I've neglected them all.  I don't deserve them – they're treating me too well."

"You could spend a lot of time and energy pondering whether you're being treated too well.  Or, you could be grateful for the boss and the family you have.  I'd recommend being grateful.

Today I will be grateful for people who treat me well.

Life on Life's Terms (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Upcoming

Burnout: Clinical, Ethical, & Supervisory Issues
September 12, 2014 at Greenbriar-New Kensington
9:30 a.m. to 12:45 p.m
$30 payable in advance, at the door, or by invoice after the training

This three hour training is accredited for:

• Addiction Counselors by the Pa. Certification Board
• CRCs  by the Commission on Rehabilitation Counselor Certification # 11938191652 and 11938191653 (one hour Ethics portion)
• Counselors by NAADAC #477 and NBCC #6352
• EAPs by the Employee Assistance Certification Commission
• Social Workers by the University of Pittsburgh School of Social Work.

Other Blogs

 AArdvarks, a daily messages blog about a group of young people in recovery can be found at: https://www.goodreads.com/author_blog_posts/6841756-telling-on-my-addiction

Smart Bears, Angry Rats

Common love      75 years from now
There was a pause in the conversation, then Gretchen asked, "What happened to your parents' marriage?  I mean we've never talked about it, and I've always wondered.  Were they really in love, before your father's drinking got out of hand?" 

"My mother and father spent the first five years of their lives together high or drunk. She got tired of it, but he didn't.  When she got sober, they had nothing in common, but she held onto the idea she must have loved him.  She was sure when he got sober they'd fall back in love." 

"Why did she think she still loved him?"

"It's easy to mistake having a common love for being in love," Olsen said. "You're going to hate this analogy, but have you ever seen two sets of grandparents fussing over the same baby?  Both couples can love that baby with all their hearts, but barely know the other couple.  I think my parents loved chemicals, but barely knew each other.  They had to both get sober to realize they were just acquaintances who had shared a love of smoke and booze."  

Today I will remember having a common love is not the same as being in love. 

Smart Bears, Angry Rats (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Monday
August 18, 2014

Life on Life's Terms

Back up

A young woman named Kate who had just started treatment poked her head into my office.  "Got a minute?" she asked. 

"What's up?"

"The other Ken told me I'd get my energy back if I stayed clean and sober.  Today I just wanted to hide under the covers.  I have no energy, and it takes every ounce of strength I have to get moving.  When will my energy come back?"

"Do you watch football?" I asked.  "Sometimes a player gets flattened but bounces right back up.  Other times he'll lie on the field for five minutes before he gets up and walks away."

"And sometimes they carry him off the field in a stretcher.  No offense, but you suck at cheering people up," she said.

"Listen, you didn't get carried off on a stretcher.  You're not in the hospital, and you're not in jail.  You're just getting back on your feet a little slowly.  Like it says in the Big Book, 'sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly.'"

Today I will get back up.

Maybe quickly, maybe slowly, but I will get back up.

  

Life on Life's Terms (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Upcoming

Burnout: Clinical, Ethical, & Supervisory Issues
September 12, 2014 at Greenbriar-New Kensington
9:30 a.m. to 12:45 p.m
$30 payable in advance, at the door, or by invoice after the training

This three hour training is accredited for:

• Addiction Counselors by the Pa. Certification Board
• CRCs  by the Commission on Rehabilitation Counselor Certification # 11938191652 and 11938191653 (one hour Ethics portion)
• Counselors by NAADAC #477 and NBCC #6352
• EAPs by the Employee Assistance Certification Commission
• Social Workers by the University of Pittsburgh School of Social Work.

Other Blogs

 AArdvarks, a daily messages blog about a group of young people in recovery can be found at: https://www.goodreads.com/author_blog_posts/6836931-lost-and-profound

Smart Bears, Angry Rats

To thine own self  75 years from now

     Olsen was on his way to pick up Ubutu when the phone chirped.  A transparent image of Gretchen appeared on the bottom of the windshield. "Did you know that Ubutu and his wife eloped?" Gretchen asked. "They had the blessing of both families, but they eloped."

      "Ubutu ran off to get married?" Olsen asked. "That doesn't sound like him at all."

       "Maybe eloped was the wrong word.  They started planning a big church wedding in Nairobi, but decided to get married by the local magistrate instead.  Just Ubutu, his wife, and their parents were there."

       "Why are you telling me this?"  Olsen asked, curious and hopeful.  

       "I was at my mother's house last night.  Your mother was there.  They were talking about the wedding plans."

       "And?"

       "And they were talking about the wedding plans.  I wasn't. I suddenly realized I was never really interested in a big church wedding.   People around me were."

       "So now what?" Olsen asked trying to mask his relief at not having to feign interest in wedding planning.

       "Can we get married by the magistrate?  Maybe invite our parents and a few close friends?  That's what I really want.  Do you think our folks will understand?"

      "I think they will.  And if they don't, we'll try to be polite.  We'll let them know we're sorry they feel that way, but we'll do things our way. Like Shakespeare said, to thine own self be true."

                         Today I will be considerate of others, but true to myself.

                              Smart Bears, Angry Rats (2014) by Ken Montrose

Friday
August 15, 2014

Life on Life's Terms

Silver Lining

The next morning I took my dog outside.  The temperature was a balmy  -5^N.  On a warmer day, she might have walked around the yard for fifteen minutes looking for a particular patch of grass to kill.  That day she watered the lawn in record time.  I didn't like the cold, but the freezing temperature did shorten the trip.

Today I will look for the silver lining.

  

Life on Life's Terms (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Freebie

This week's freebie is the Kindle version of Home Groupies a daily message book in the form of a novella.  It is available at  http://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S.


To read Kindle books on a PC or Mac, you can download a free app at: http://www.amazon.com/gp/feature.html?ie=UTF8&docId=1000426311

Upcoming

Burnout: Clinical, Ethical, & Supervisory Issues
September 12, 2014 at Greenbriar-New Kensington
9:30 a.m. to 12:45 p.m
$30 payable in advance, at the door, or by invoice after the training

This three hour training is accredited for:

• Addiction Counselors by the Pa. Certification Board
• CRCs  by the Commission on Rehabilitation Counselor Certification # 11938191652 and 11938191653 (one hour Ethics portion)
• Counselors by NAADAC #477 and NBCC #6352
• EAPs by the Employee Assistance Certification Commission
• Social Workers by the University of Pittsburgh School of Social Work.

Other Blogs

 AArdvarks, a daily messages blog about a group of young people in recovery can be found at: https://www.goodreads.com/author_blog_posts/6820837-today

Smart Bears, Angry Rats

Take that, and that, and that … 75 years from now

Mice, being prey to many things, had developed exceptional hearing.  Brown could hear the rhythm of five beating hearts.  It made him happy.

A scientist might say Brown's special breeding, in combination with the virus, had altered his brain.  Whatever happiness Brown was feeling, they would argue, was the result of changes in serotonin, dopamine, and other brain chemicals. These changes allowed Brown to experience complex emotions most mice couldn't feel.

Listening to his offspring's heartbeats slowed Brown's heart rate and breathing.  It raised his temperature slightly, and released chemicals into his brain those same scientists found in animals with strong bonds to their mates.  Even a smart mouse like Brown couldn't understand how brain chemicals worked.  He just knew he felt good.

Today I will be grateful for chemicals I don't have to take to feel good.

Thursday
August 14, 2014

Life on Life's Terms

Knowledge in motion

That night my daughter was still working on her homework as I got ready for bed.

"Why do I do this to myself?" she asked, looking from her homework to the clock.

"Did you know I wrote my master's thesis on procrastination?" I asked.

"Did you really?"

"Yep.  Here's the deal, procrastination can be very rewarding.  You put off doing something that makes you anxious, which is sort of a reward. If you're successful, there's a rush of excitement as you finish at the very last minute. You pay a price in stress because it hangs over your head, and you know you're not doing your best work."

"But if you know that's what you're doing to yourself, why would you keep doing it?"

"Knowing something isn't enough.  Knowledge isn't power unless it's put in motion."

"And we put off putting into motion our knowledge of procrastination?"

"It's a vicious cycle," I said, kissing her goodnight.

"You're not going to stay up with me?"

"I don't want to put off going to sleep," I said.  "Trying to break that procrastination cycle."

Today I will try to put knowledge into motion.

  

Life on Life's Terms (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Freebie

This week's freebie is the Kindle version of Home Groupies a daily message book in the form of a novella.  It is available at  http://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S.


To read Kindle books on a PC or Mac, you can download a free app at: http://www.amazon.com/gp/feature.html?ie=UTF8&docId=1000426311

Upcoming

Burnout: Clinical, Ethical, & Supervisory Issues
September 12, 2014 at Greenbriar-New Kensington
9:30 a.m. to 12:45 p.m
$30 payable in advance, at the door, or by invoice after the training

This three hour training is accredited for:

• Addiction Counselors by the Pa. Certification Board
• CRCs  by the Commission on Rehabilitation Counselor Certification # 11938191652 and 11938191653 (one hour Ethics portion)
• Counselors by NAADAC #477 and NBCC #6352
• EAPs by the Employee Assistance Certification Commission
• Social Workers by the University of Pittsburgh School of Social Work.

Other Blogs

 AArdvarks, a daily messages blog about a group of young people in recovery can be found at: https://www.goodreads.com/author_blog_posts/6815785-authentically-yours

Smart Bears, Angry Rats

Selfish Unselfishness

I was sitting in the basement, writing on my laptop, when my son came in through the garage door.  I read the previous chapter aloud to him.

"There's another message here," I said to my son.  "Do you know what it is?"

"Come in through the front door so you don't have to help your dad with his writing projects?"

"No.  It's better to do unselfish things for selfish reasons, than selfish things for what seem like unselfish reasons."

"What's the difference if it all works out in the end?" he asked. 

"If I start by doing something unselfish, no matter what the reason, somebody is likely to benefit. That's just the nature of unselfish acts.  They benefit others. There's no such thing as an unselfish act that hurts someone. It's a bonus if it benefits me. But, if do something selfish first, there's a good chance it will harm the other guy, and it may or may not benefit me."

"Uh huh.  I see your point.  Can you give me $10?"

"Why would I do that?"

"It's an unselfish act that will benefit me, and maybe make you feel better about yourself."

Today I will do something unselfish first.

Smart Bears, Angry Rats (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Wednesday
August 13, 2014

Life on Life's Terms

Please recycle

The next morning I was eating my breakfast cereal when I noticed a small symbol at the bottom of box.  Tiny arrows encircled the words "100% recycled paperboard."

"I'm paperboard," I said out loud to myself.

  On rare days I felt a miserable kinship with recycled paper – shredded, drowned, re-formed, and dried out.  But most days I felt happily recycled – taken from the trash heap and made useful again.

Today I will be grateful I was recycled.

  

Life on Life's Terms (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Freebie

This week's freebie is the Kindle version of Home Groupies a daily message book in the form of a novella.  It is available at  http://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S.


To read Kindle books on a PC or Mac, you can download a free app at: http://www.amazon.com/gp/feature.html?ie=UTF8&docId=1000426311

Upcoming

Burnout: Clinical, Ethical, & Supervisory Issues
September 12, 2014 at Greenbriar-New Kensington
9:30 a.m. to 12:45 p.m
$30 payable in advance, at the door, or by invoice after the training

This three hour training is accredited for:

• Addiction Counselors by the Pa. Certification Board
• CRCs  by the Commission on Rehabilitation Counselor Certification # 11938191652 and 11938191653 (one hour Ethics portion)
• Counselors by NAADAC #477 and NBCC #6352
• EAPs by the Employee Assistance Certification Commission
• Social Workers by the University of Pittsburgh School of Social Work.

Other Blogs

 AArdvarks, a daily messages blog about a group of young people in recovery can be found at: https://www.goodreads.com/author_blog_posts/6808483-sparkplugs

Smart Bears, Angry Rats

I'm doing it for you 75 years from now

Sammy had decided to accept The Caller's offer.  'Not because I have to,' he thought, 'but because I want to.  I could tell The Caller to buzz off.  And I could stop taking Lil' Bit if I wanted to, but why would I when I'm so close to finding a cure?  I owe it to cancer victims to keep taking Lil' Bit.'  It helps me see the big picture.'

Sammy wasn't done.  'Ubutu may be a smart guy, but he doesn't understand biochemistry the way I do.  Showing him how some illegal drugs really work might get him to invest with The Caller.  Imagine the good they could do if they combined forces.'

'And what about Olsen?' Sammy thought. 'Olsen thinks everybody who expands his mind is going to wind up like Olsen's father.  Clearly he doesn't understand the difference between a primitive drug like alcohol and something as complex as Lil' Bit. If I show him that not all drugs are the same, he might lighten up. He might even enjoy life a little more. I owe him that much.'

Sammy smiled.  The more he thought about it, the more he saw the good side of taking Lil' Bit and working for The Caller.  'It would be selfish not to.'

Today I will beware of my ability justify anything I really want to do.

Smart Bears, Angry Rats (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Tuesday
August 12, 2014

Life on Life's Terms

Running man

That night I hit the gym on the way home.  After running five miles, I checked my iPod.  In the fifteen months I had owned the device, I had run almost 500 miles and lost about two pounds.

 

For a split second I couldn't fathom how I could have run so far and lost so little.  Then I remembered reading somewhere you couldn't outrun a bad diet.  I thought my doughnut, cookie, cheeseburger, and cake diet might qualify.  I wondered if there was anything else I was trying to outrun, literally or figuratively. 

Today I will take an inventory to see what I might be running from.

  

Life on Life's Terms (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose

Freebie

This week's freebie is the Kindle version of Home Groupies a daily message book in the form of a novella.  It is available at  http://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S.


To read Kindle books on a PC or Mac, you can download a free app at: http://www.amazon.com/gp/feature.html?ie=UTF8&docId=1000426311

Upcoming

Burnout: Clinical, Ethical, & Supervisory Issues
September 12, 2014 at Greenbriar-New Kensington
9:30 a.m. to 12:45 p.m
$30 payable in advance, at the door, or by invoice after the training

This three hour training is accredited for:

• Addiction Counselors by the Pa. Certification Board
• CRCs  by the Commission on Rehabilitation Counselor Certification # 11938191652 and 11938191653 (one hour Ethics portion)
• Counselors by NAADAC #477 and NBCC #6352
• EAPs by the Employee Assistance Certification Commission
• Social Workers by the University of Pittsburgh School of Social Work.

Other Blogs

 AArdvarks, a daily messages blog about a group of young people in recovery can be found at: https://www.goodreads.com/author_blog_posts/6803744-flexible-plans

Smart Bears, Angry Rats

Your mileage may vary

"Two TV stations!" my daughter said, not ready to move past this unpleasant scenario. "Sammy is a bad man!"

"He's not a bad person at heart. He's not working long hours for the money.  Sammy wants to do something to benefit humanity.  His most selfish motivation is wanting his wife back."

"So why do things go bad?"

"Sammy doesn't understand the trade-off between speed and mileage."

"Once again, you lost me, Dad.  What's gas mileage have to do with Lil' Bit and Sammy?" she asked.

"I didn't mean speed and mileage literally.  Suppose I have just enough gas to get across Kansas driving sixty miles per hour.  If I don't understand the trade-off between speed and mileage, I might decide to drive eighty miles per hour, thinking I'll cross faster, before I run out of gas."

"Still don't see what that has to do with Sammy," my daughter said.

"Taking the Lil' Bit was like speeding up to eighty.  Sammy went faster for a while, but he will run out of gas before he reaches his destination."

"I get it.  Why'd you pick Kansas?  The story takes place in Pennsylvania."

"Because Kansas has tornadoes.  They represent challenges life throws at you. Someone going eighty may either be too hyped up on their speed to notice the tornadoes, or convinced he can outrun them."

Today I won't sacrifice mileage for speed.

Smart Bears, Angry Rats (c) 2014 by Ken Montrose