Fawlty Showers 2

 

Is That Coffee I Smell?

I asked them to draw the nose on the stick figure and list three favorite smells.

A guy named Rudy said, “I can still smell the coffee my ex drank in the kitchen, always by herself, because I was too hungover to get out of bed.  No wonder she left me.”

Rudy shook his head and smiled, “Now I’m starting to love the smell of coffee when I come here in the morning. It smells like hope.”

A young man named Art snorted. “I remember the smell of the detective’s coffee the first time I was interrogated. I’ve done my time, and I’m getting sober.  Coffee smells like freedom to me.”

Someone asked me if coffee was on my list.

Coffee had gone from the only thing keeping me moving the morning after a binge to my favorite way to start the day.

After I got sober, I worked for the same facility for eight years, then twenty-three at another. I’d always been where my children needed me. Dr. Deb and I had celebrated our 31^st anniversary that year.

“To me,” I told the group, “morning coffee smells like being responsible, fatherhood, and love.  Savoring those things, is part of stopping to smell the coffee for me.”

 

Today I will stop and smell the coffee.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

Fawlty Showers 2

I Hear That

I told the group to draw the ears on the stick figure and list their three favorite sounds.

A young man asked if he could list things he’d be grateful to never hear again now that he was sober. I told him that was fine, and the group liked the idea.

“My wife not adding a ‘but’ after ‘I love you.’”

“The sound of my own voice when I’m lying about where I was, what I was doing, why I wasn’t where I was supposed to be.”

“’License and registration,’ followed by ‘step out of the car.’”

“My inner voice asking me why I keep doing this to myself.”

“My imaginative friends making up stories to fill the gaps in my memory.”

I added a few sounds of my own.

 

Today I’ll make a list of things I’ll be grateful to never hear again.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

 

Fawlty Showers 2

 

Hold Tight

We continued the gratitude exercise.

“Draw in the stick figure’s eyes. Next to the eyes list three of your favorite sights.”

I noticed a middle-aged woman wipe away a tear. I asked she was OK.

She said, “There was an accident at work last year.  My husband wasn’t hurt, but other people were killed. I was so happy to see him come out of the building alive...”

She choked up a little, but added, “I feel guilty listing that as one of my favorite sights when so many people didn’t see anything but heartache and smoke pour out of that building.”

An older man said to her, “Sometimes you gotta pick the gratitude out of the sadness.  My buddy was killed by a drunk driver. I’m sorry for his family, but grateful I’m still around for mine.”

She nodded, still looking sad and uncertain. “I guess you have to hold your gratitude in one hand and your sorrow in the other.”

The man nodded and said, “Hold the gratitude tight, though.  It helps you get through the sorrow.”  

Today I’ll hold tight my gratitude.

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

Fawlty Showers 2

  (NOTE: I posted this exercise before, but thought I’d use it as a tie-in to Thanksgiving.)

It's A Stretch

“It’s Thanksgiving week,” I said to the group. “Let’s do a gratitude exercise.”

Twenty-five sets of eyes rolled at once. I continued.

“So, draw a stick figure holding a flag. In the flag list something you have to surrender, something you can’t change, something you can’t get back, or something you’ve lost.  Something you have to accept.”

A young woman said, “If we’re trying to be grateful, starting with something we have to accept sucks.”

“Sometimes a step backwards gives you room to build momentum as you move forward.”

“That might make sense,” she said, “but it still sucks.”

An older woman, who’d had years sober but relapsed when her son OD’d, said, “Acceptance is gratitude’s warm-up. It’s an uncomfortable stretch that makes it easier to move through gratitude.”

Today I know acceptance is gratitude’s warm-up stretch.

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

• www.greenbriartraining.com

• https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

Fawlty Showers 2

 

Who Do You Think You’re Foolin’?

When I was drinking I never called off when I was hungover. I went to work near death because, in my mind, calling off would confirm I couldn’t control my drinking.

Deep down I knew going to work hungover was dishonest. I didn’t work so much as I just survived the day.  Not taking a day off didn’t prove anything, except I was willing to fool myself.

That day I sent a text to corporate and Katy telling them I wouldn’t be in. Because years ago I had finally gotten honest about my drinking problem, I had no need to pretend to feel OK when I didn’t.

I thought about all the ways people deceive themselves about jobs, relationships, and the like. We tend to pay a price.

“It pays to be rigorously honest,” I said to the cat as I sank back into the couch.  “Especially with yourself.”

Today I will be rigorously honest, especially with myself.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

Fawlty Showers 2

 

Not Self-Inflicted

The next day I woke up almost wishing I hadn’t.

My throat felt like I had been gargling glass. The pounding at my temples took my mind off the feeling my sinuses were about to blow out the front of my skull. 

I didn’t have the all over aches that come with the flu, but I was tired. So tired. Almost too tired to see out of my watery eyes.

The voice in my head, the one responsible for sarcastic remarks, asked, “So what are we ever so grateful for today?”

“It’s not a hangover,” I answered the voice. “I didn’t do this to myself.”

 

Today I’ll be grateful for whatever pain I don’t inflict on myself.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

Fawlty SHowers 2

 Just A Moment

I spent a lot of my time thinking ‘I’ve got to get the next thing done.’

That night I was sitting with my laptop open, half watching TV, trying to work on a short story.  I couldn’t have said why.

“Time for bed,” Dr. Deb said. I told her I’d be up in a minute. I looked at what I’d written. It was awful. I could feel my frustration in my bones.

I remembered a conversation I’d overheard. An AA oldtimer quoted the Bible to a newcomer who was struggling with a number of issues: “Be still, and know that I am.”

A sad look crossed the young man’s face as he told the oldtimer he was an atheist.

“Then just be still,” the oldtimer said.  “Take a moment to just put it all aside. Whatever is bothering you will still be there after you’ve had a peaceful moment.”

 

Today I’ll take a moment to just be still.

 

 Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

Fawlty Showers 2

 

Kidding Yourself

Dr. Deb sat down next to me.  “Ooh, that shirt stinks,” she said, grimacing.

“It’s a workout shirt,” I said. “You’ll notice I’m wearing running shorts. Plan to hit the exercise bike before we go to bed.”

Dr. Deb laughed. “You know you’re kidding yourself, right? When bedtime rolls around you’ll be too tired.”

I started to argue, but deep down knew she might be right. I thought of other times people I’d known had been kidding themselves.

A friend had told me he was going to look at a classic motorcycle just to see it.  He wasn’t going to buy another bike. His wife would kill him. At least he got to keep it after the divorce.

A guy I knew had said he thought he was more entrepreneur than drug-dealer. The judge had told him he’d been kidding himself, and sent him away for seven years.

Long ago I had stopped kidding myself about what would happen if I decided to have ‘a beer or two.’ Life has been better ever since.

Today I won’t kid myself.

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

Fawlty Showers 2

 

Oldies

I was sitting on the couch next to the dog when Epiphany Chaser texted me to ask what vet we used. She got me thinking about her lead, and who I wanted to be.

Epiphany had called her father ‘Old Yeller’. He showed up when she was in trouble, yelling about how important he was, bragging about who he knew, threatening whomever she’d gotten into trouble with.

“It was always more about his ego than me,” Epiphany had said.

Epiphany admired her best friend’s father, who she nicknamed ‘Old Faithful’. He was always there when her friend needed him.  He had gone to parent-teacher conferences, coached her soccer team, and never left her corner.

“If you want to be there for them,” I said to the dog, “You first gotta clear what gets in the way. Could be ego, anger, alcohol, being a workaholic, whatever.” I was grateful I’d gotten alcohol out of the way.

 

Today I will clear away whatever keeps me from being there for the people I love.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

Fawlty Showers 2

Memory

The next day, fall reminded us she was winter’s closest friend.  The temperature dropped, a little snow fell from the gloomy gray skies. 

Folks said foolish people had ‘no more sense than God gave a goose.’  The geese flying overhead had the good sense to get away before the really bad weather arrived.

Every year, when the weather turned, I remembered my mother sitting in the recliner we pulled close to the fireplace. She always had our dog on her lap while she read the paper, a look of contentment on her face. I loved that memory of her.

After I got sober, I started putting together a string of good memories like that one.  Each was much better than the times I’d disappointed the people around me, due mostly to my drinking.

Today I’ll make better memories.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

 

Fawlty Showers 2

 Fawlty Showers will return on Monday. We are providing a training to benefit Operation Troop Appreciation. 

Happy Veterans' Day! 

Fawlty Showers 2

 

You Don’t Know

That night I went to my home-group. The Preacher wasn’t in his usual spot up front, sitting near the back, off to the side instead.

Epiphany Chaser came and sat next to me. Mojo curled up between our feet, his head resting on my shoe. I scratched his ears.

“I’m the speaker tonight,” Epiphany said.  She seemed distracted, unusual for her.

“You Ok?” I asked.

“I am, but I hate dredging up some of my past.”

Nothing horrible had happened to her, despite her habit of getting drunk and putting herself in dangerous situations.  She’d grown up smart, pretty, and financially secure.

Early in her life, Epiphany had realized how unimportant she was to the people who mattered most to her.  She’d spent most of her life failing to get their attention.

Seeing the pain on her face as she described her loneliness was heartbreaking.

“It’s a cliché, but it’s true,” I said to Mojo. “You never know what someone has been through, what scars they bear.”  

I didn’t have to tell the dog the point was to be kind to people who may have fought battles you knew nothing about.

Today I’ll assume everybody has been through something.

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

Fawlty Showers 2

Dog

The woman’s name was Amanda. I asked her what brought her into treatment.

“I missed a vet appointment,” she said. “Rescheduled and missed it again.”

The group fell silent, pondering how somebody so captured by drugs could find the strength and focus to take care of a pet.  

Amanda pulled out her phone and passed around a picture of a plump wiener dog.

“No matter how bad I got, I always took care of Dewey,” she said, wiping away a tear. “When I missed a couple of vet appointments in a row, I knew I had to stop.”

An older man sitting next to Amanda put his arm around her shoulder. “How ‘bout from now on you treat yourself as good as you treat that dog?”

While the group encouraged Amanda, I thought about how often we are more attentive to our pets’ needs than we are to our own.

 

Today I’ll treat myself as well as I’d treat a beloved pet.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

Fawlty Showers 2

 

Celebrating Small Victories

I ran the morning group, starting with an exercise where I asked them to list one good thing they were doing.

“It’s not much, but I’m eating,” a young woman said, almost in a whisper. “Small victory, maybe.”

To group broke into applause.

“Damn right you are,” someone said.

“Ain’t no small thing” the man to her left said. “It’s a big step in the right direction.”

She had arrived at our door weighing 87 lbs. on a 5’8” frame, mostly due to her love of whatever stimulant she could get her hands on. 

Once she cleared detox, we suspected depression continued to rob her of an appetite. I was thrilled to hear she was finally eating.

I said, “Even if you see it as a just a small victory, you’d be wise to celebrate it.  Life is too full of setbacks not to savor every win.”

 

Today I’ll celebrate ‘small’ victories.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

Fawlty Showers 2

 

Adapt

“You know what scares me?” she asked, stroking DD The Bunny.

I shook my head.

“How adaptable we can be.”

“Wouldn’t you say adapting is a good thing?”

She thought for a minute, scratching DD between his ears.

“Not always. Some people change because they’re sick and tired, some adapt to their misery.”

I nodded. “I guess the trick is to know when to adapt and when to change.”

She shook her head, looked down at DD, and said, “I adapted to living with my drug loving boyfriend until I couldn’t remember who I was before I met him. He’s adapted to being sick and tired.”

“Time for a change,” I said.

 

Today I’ll beware of adapting to things I’d be better off changing.

 

 Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

Fawlty Showers 2

 Small Battles

A young woman walked past my office, saw DipshitDumbass The Bunny, and turned around.

“Can I?” she asked pointing to him.

“Absolutely,” I said, waving her in. She sat opposite me and put DD in her lap.

She was very attractive, with a ready smile, made up, and fashionably dressed. If I passed by her on the street I would have thought she had not a care in the world.

“You may have noticed I’m a little overdressed for rehab,” she said with a slight chuckle.

“Well, you’re not wearing the ‘mussed hair, pajama chic’ look that’s popular around here.”

“I’m struggling to get sober, it’s a struggle.  Just to show myself I’m up to it, I’m trying to win little battles along the way.”

“Like getting dressed up when you don’t really feel like it?”

She nodded. “I like to think of doing anything I’m supposed to do when I don’t feel like it is winning a small battle. That and doing anything that makes me feel better about myself.”

 

Today I will win the little battles along the way.

 

 Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

Fawlty Showers 2

 

Down But Not Out

After Dana left, I opened my laptop.  The icons for several projects I’d started, but made no progress on, caught my eye. My mood sank into disappointment with myself.

“What would you say to a good friend,” I asked myself. “If they said they were disappointed in themselves?”

“Disappointed is not defeated,” I answered. “You can still do it!”

“Anything else?”

“This talking to yourself thing is getting out of hand.”

 

Today I’ll remember disappointed is not defeated.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

Fawlty Showers 2

 

Good Influence

The next day I asked Dana how things were going with her daughter and the new boyfriend.

“I love this kid!” Dana said. “I was ready to not like him, thinking he might be the next Dope Without Hope, but he’s been nothing but a good influence.”

“How so?” I asked.

“The other day I heard him tell her she should learn a trade or go to college so she always had a profession.”

“You were eavesdropping?”

“I was being a mother.  The point is I told her the same thing, but The Princess could hear it from him.”

“Pays to have more than one good influence in your life,” I said.

“Makes you think you should try to be a good influence because you might be that one person somebody will listen to.”

 

Today I’ll try to be one more good influence.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible