Sunday, February 9^th, 2020

Recalculating

The next day, my wife and I were driving to Brat Boy’s volleyball game.  Where the road split, the GPS wanted us to take the southern route.  We took the northern route. It was eight miles longer but had almost no red lights. For the next twenty minutes the GPS tried to get us to turn around or take a backroad to the southern route. Every time we ignored it, the GPS announced ‘recalculating.’

It reminded me of that little voice that brings so many people back to addiction. It convinces them to try a side road. Their inner addict recalculates, bringing them back to the main road they thought they’d left behind.  

 A friend of mine was addicted to unhealthy, controlling, relationships. After years of abuse, she finally broke up with a narcissistic attorney. A month later she had joined a cultish church. The scared little girl in her head had recalculated, and found a new path back onto the same rocky road. 

I knew someone who kicked heroin, started drinking, convincing himself he was a social drinker. He sobered up, and recalculated how he’d fill the emptiness inside. He slept with every AA newcomer he could seduce. It took him forever to recognize sex was his new addiction.

Today I won’t recalculate my way back to addiction.

2020 Vision ©2017 by Ken Montrose

2020 Vision is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at: www.greenbriartraining.com https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/