Life on Life's Terms II

Have you thought about this?

Marty, Benjamin, and Terry where standing around the coffee pot in the kitchen when I refilled my cup.  Marty had told them he was thinking of getting a divorce.  Benjamin and Terry thought he’d lost his mind.

“You don’t throw away thirty-five years of marriage because you’re wife annoys you,” Terry said.  Marty had complained before his wife was a control freak with a touch of OCD.  Now he told us she was upset about how much time he spent at NA meetings.

Call it ageism, but I was slow to suspect an older man might have another motive for leaving his wife.  Benjamin was much quicker to guess the real reason for Marty was thinking about divorce.

“You met somebody,” Benjamin said.  “You met somebody, probably at an NA meeting, and you’re thinking of trading in your wife for a newer model.”

“There’s more to it than that,” Marty insisted.  The more he tried to explain, the more I realized there really wasn’t much more.  Terry told Marty he shouldn’t make such a major decision without a lot more thought.  Benjamin and I agreed,but Marty didn’t seem to hear us.

Today I won’t make major changes based on minor consideration.

Life on Life’s Terms II © 2015 by Ken Montrose

(Just a reminder: LOLT II is a work of fiction.  Any resemblance to anyone you might know is purely coincidental.)

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Pay Heed

The next day I called The Boss to update her on my conversation with Dr. Ludden.  The Boss thought I was joking at first.  When she realized I was serious, she wanted talk to our doc and the company attorney.

Later that day she called me back to say she had spoken with our doc.  He knew Dr. Ludden and wasn’t the least bit surprised to hear she was involved in something so shady.  The Boss had also spoken with the licensing board in Harrisburg.  They too were familiar with Dr. Ludden.  Their attorney would be contacting me to get a statement.  The board wanted me to avoid any contact with Dr. Ludden until after they completed their investigation. 

I told The Boss, “I don’t think much of her, but I wish I could warn Dr. Ludden that I’ll be talking with the licensing board.  Give her a chance to clean up her act before she does anything else to damage her career.”

“I don’t know, Ken,” The Boss said, “seems to me she’s one of those people who just won’t heed life’s warnings.  It’s like getting caught in a downpour. Sometimes the storm clouds gather silently and suddenly.  You can’t blame yourself if you get soaked.  But if you hear the thunder, and you’ve seen the weather forecast, and people around you are holding umbrellas….”

I thought of all of life’s warnings that go unheeded: chest pain, a loved one’s controlling behavior, late payment notices, missing money, falling grades, and all of addiction’s warning signs, to name a few.  Over the years I’d seen too many people pay the penalty, with interest, for not heeding life’s warnings.

Today I will heed life’s warnings.

Life on Life’s Terms II © 2015 by Ken Montrose

(Just a reminder: LOLT II is a work of fiction.  Any resemblance to anyone you might know is purely coincidental.)

Let me get this straight

The phone rang. The female caller said she was Dr. Ludden.  She had gotten my number from Mikey.  It took me a moment to realize she was Mikey’s sister-in-law, the psychiatrist.  One of her twin brothers had overdosed on Klonopin and was in the E.R.  She had written the prescription.  Her main concern seemed to be avoiding questions about her prescribing practices.  Her plan was to detox him herself.  She wanted to admit him to our facility on paper, but keep him at home. 

At first I thought she must have been kidding.  I decided to play along. “If I present this to our doc, he’s gonna ask why we don’t just bring your brother here.   I’m kinda wondering the same thing.” 

“Nothing against your doctor, but nobody understands my brother like I do," Dr. Ludden said. "He’ll feel safest if I oversee his detox.  And,” she paused, “I’ve had a little misunderstanding with the licensing board.  They might not see the wisdom in treating him at home.  Bureaucrats.  Besides, you’ll get paid, but I’ll do all the work.  It’s a win-win.” It was also the craziest thing I’d heard in a long time.

“So you want to be in charge of the detox, do it at home, but have our doc sign off on it? Don’t think he’ll go for it.”

“Listen Ken, I know how big clinics like yours work.  You do all the paperwork and some poor overworked doc just signs it. We only need two signatures, one agreeing my brother can be detoxed at home, and another when he’s done. Get the signatures, and I’ll pay you a processing fee in cash.”

It had always been my policy when facing a stupid, unethical, or ridiculous request to repeat it out loud. “You want to pay me under the table to sneak paperwork past our doc twice, in order to avoid embarrassing questions the AMA might ask.  If something goes wrong, he’ll be responsible for a patient he doesn’t know he’s treating.”   She didn’t seem to grasp the ridiculousness of her request.   I listed the parts of the addiction counselor code of ethics she wanted me to violate.  She still seemed oblivious to problems she’d be creating by the way she wanted to handle the problems she already had.  On the other hand, I felt satisfied I had done all I could to enlighten her.

“No,” I said, and hung up.

If today I encounter a stupid, unethical, or ridiculous request, I will repeat it out loud to whoever made the request.  I will do this for their sake and mine.

Life on Life’s Terms II © 2015 by Ken Montrose

(Just a reminder: LOLT II is a work of fiction.  Any resemblance to anyone you might know is purely coincidental.)

Catch my drift?

Brat Boy asked me why I still took a daily inventory after being sober so many years.  I told him inventories were one way to keep from drifting back to old bad habits.  I explained that most people don’t make a conscious decision to screw up their lives, they drift into dangerous waters. 

“Drift erodes almost everything good you can think of,” I told him, “from healthy eating to ethics.   Smart people don’t let drift set in.  Let me give you an example.” He rolled his eyes, but I plowed ahead.

“One day I picked up your grandfather to go fishing.  This was maybe ten years ago, so figure your grandparents had been together at least fifty years.  As he got up to leave, your grandmother, in that stern voice of hers, asked ‘aren’t you forgetting something?’  Your grandfather patted his pockets to make sure he had his keys and his wallet.  He held up the phone in his hand and slid his sunglasses from the top of his head down over his eyes.  Just then he noticed the big smile on your grandmother’s face.”

“He didn’t forget anything, she was just messing with him,” Brat Boy guessed.

“He forgot to kiss her goodbye.  They never let their relationship drift, they always looked after the little things that kept their romance alive.  That’s why they were so happy together. There’s a reward for not letting the good things drift.”

Today I will beware of drift.

Life on Life’s Terms II © 2015 by Ken Montrose

(Just a reminder: LOLT II is a work of fiction.  Any resemblance to anyone you might know is purely coincidental.)

Bloody Paws – A truly twisted metaphor

When I got home that night Brat Boy was texting a friend.  Scowling, he put down the phone and shook his head. “He can’t go to the state playoffs with us because Demanda has to babysit.  She doesn’t want to babysit alone, so he has to miss the game.  Why can’t he see she’s evil? Why?”

 “He’s looking at her eyes instead of her paws,” I said.  Brat Boy stared blankly.  “She’s a wolf in sheep’s clothing.  She looks innocent and sweet, but she’s got the blood of the people she’s trampled on her paws.  Didn’t you’ll tell me she has three ex-boyfriends who all despise her?  Didn’t you say they all had good reasons to? Your friend needs to look at his girlfriend's paws.  If he wants to know her true character, look at how she treats people she believes are beneath her.  Does she walk all over them, or try to lift them up?”

“You know what’s funny, Dad?” Brat Boy asked.  “She doesn’t see herself as evil.  If you ask, she’ll tell you she’s had nothing but bad luck with boys. She thinks she’s a lamb, not a wolf.”

“She needs to look at her paws, but I doubt she will any time soon. Most of us like to think we’re good, even when we hurt other people.  Hard to admit we’re wolves sometimes, harder still to admit we’ve got blood on our paws.  We owe it to ourselves and to the people around us to look at how we treat people.”

“You ever have blood on your paws, Dad?” he asked.

“I have.  That’s why I look at how I treated people when I take my daily inventory.”

  

Today I will look for blood on my paws.

Life on Life’s Terms II © 2015 by Ken Montrose

(Just a reminder: LOLT II is a work of fiction.  Any resemblance to anyone you might know is purely coincidental.)

Have Happy Memorial Day Weekend!

Life on Life's Terms will return on Tuesday.

Pride

When I got to practice that night KC was having an animated conversation with one of the dads.  I felt the tension from across the gym. This particular father had been one of the gang of four who thought he or she should have been the coach.  He had been a vocal critic of KC - behind the scenes, in Father Tim’s office, and from the stands. 

I was stunned when I saw the man hug KC before turning to leave.  He nodded at me on his way out.

KC told me the man had apologized.  “That couldn't have been easy,” I said.  KC said the man had trouble looking him in the eye, struggled to get the words out, but said he had been wrong.  Our two point victory in the last game had convinced him KC knew what he was doing. 

“He even said I was a good influence on the boys,” KC said, smiling.  With a laugh, he added, “Your name didn't come up.”

Today I won’t let my pride get in the way of doing the right thing.

Life on Life’s Terms II © 2015 by Ken Montrose

(Just a reminder: LOLT II is a work of fiction.  Any resemblance to anyone you might know is purely coincidental.)

What can you do?

When I got to the gym locker room that night, several men were discussing the rash of overdose deaths in Pittsburgh.

“What can you do?” someone asked.  It was a rhetorical question, but I answered him anyway.

I told him he could clean out his medicine cabinet. Get rid of everything he didn’t need.  Do everything possible not to need the painkillers some docs were so quick to prescribe. If he did need something for pain, make sure nobody else was taking his medications, especially his kids. Tell his representatives to support funding for treatment. 

He said he knew his kids would never abuse his medications.  I asked him if he had ever done anything his parents didn't know about.  We both laughed.  I mentally listed five things I was grateful my parents never heard about.

He wished he could do more, that managing his pills didn't seem like much.  I told him we couldn't all be DEA agents or detox nurses, dealing directly with the problem.  We do what we can, 

Today I will do what I can.

Life on Life’s Terms II © 2015 by Ken Montrose

(Just a reminder: LOLT II is a work of fiction.  Any resemblance to anyone you might know is purely coincidental.)

Angels and Others

The conversation shifted to someone Terry and Benjamin had met at an AA meeting.  They weren’t big fans.  Terry said people like that were the reason he didn’t like going to AA.

“You know what AA really stands for?” Marty asked Terry.  “Angels and A’holes.  And it ain’t just AA.  The whole world is angels and a’holes and everything in between.  You gotta accept that and figure out which one you are on any given day.  Majority of us are middle of the road most of the time.  A few’re closer to being angels.  Lots of times life gives us the perfect opportunity to be a’holes, even if that’s not our character.”  I cringed, remembering things I’d said to the opposing team’s fans at a recent soccer game.

Today I will ask myself, am I on the angel side, the middle of the road, or …?

Life on Life’s Terms II © 2015 by Ken Montrose

(Just a reminder: LOLT II is a work of fiction.  Any resemblance to anyone you might know is purely coincidental.)

Before lightning strikes

Benjamin, Marty, and Terry were standing in front of the building when I got to work the next day.  The night before Benjamin’s girlfriend had told him she was pregnant.  Marty and Terry were kidding him about getting a paternity test. Although they were joking, Benjamin seemed serious when he said he wouldn't blame her if she had cheated on him. 

As the conversation continued, I was shocked by the change in Benjamin.  Gone were the bravado, arrogance, and entitlement. He seemed scared, but happy.  He also seemed willing to face his addictions head-on. 

I thought about all the people I knew who had been shocked into making changes.  Many of them had gotten a frightening diagnosis.   A few had been fired.  Others were spurred on by the death of a loved one.  All of them would have been better off making changes before they faced a crisis.   Life could have been much simpler for Benjamin and his girlfriend if he had quit drinking and gambling the first time he went to rehab five years ago.

Today I will see what changes I’d like to make before lightning strikes.

Life on Life’s Terms II © 2015 by Ken Montrose

(Just a reminder: LOLT II is a work of fiction.  Any resemblance to anyone you might know is purely coincidental.)

Recovery

“Hey Dad,” Brat Boy said, “I need a quote on addiction and recovery for my Health class assignment.  I opened a file on my laptop and sent him this:

“Addiction describing Recovery: ‘Recovery has a gentle, calming voice.  She will warn you, without criticizing you.  Recovery stands firm without being rigid or judgmental.  She will not shield you from your fears, but she will stand with you as you face them.  Recovery is slow to anger, but wants you to be angry when you have reason to be.  Recovery will never give up on you, but nor will she accept any hollow excuses.  She sees what you could be, today and each day to follow.  Recovery knows that you have a tough road to walk, and at times she will need to push you.  She loves you when you nobody else can, including you.  Even I think Recovery is beautiful.’” (Voiced by Addiction, excerpted from My Favorite Character Defects © 2005 by Ken Montrose.)

His sister read the quote over my shoulder.  “Could it be recovery from anything?” she asked.  “Does it have to be from addiction?”

“I wrote it for people recovering from addiction, but it could be anything.  Loss of a loved one, sickness, break up of a relationship.  Anything you have to recover from.”

Today I will be grateful for Recovery, no matter what I’m recovering from.

Life on Life’s Terms II © 2015 by Ken Montrose

(Just a reminder: LOLT II is a work of fiction.  Any resemblance to anyone you might know is purely coincidental.)

Demanda

When I got home that night, Blondie and Brat Boy were watching TV in the living room.  They asked me about my day, and I told them about our client whose life was coming into focus.

Brat Boy told me his friend was so fixated on his girlfriend Amanda’s looks, he couldn’t see she was the cause of much of the misery in his young life.  Blondie knew the girl.  She also knew Amanda’s past boyfriend who had nicknamed her ‘Demanda.’   Blondie added, “Boys say Amanda’s hot, which makes sense when you know where she’s from.” She didn’t mean the South.

Blondie and Brat Boy joked about ways they could open the boy’s eyes, coming up with more and more complicated schemes.  Finally, Brat boy said, “Seriously Dad, how do we make him see she’s killing him?  I was thinking we could get his friends together, do one of those intervention things you do with addicts.”    

I shook my head and told him there’s a difference between pointing something out, and rubbing someone’s nose in it.  “Unless something is literally killing someone, you express your concern and let it go,” I said.

Today I will point it out, and let it go.

Life on Life’s Terms II © 2015 by Ken Montrose

(Just a reminder: LOLT II is a work of fiction.  Any resemblance to anyone you might know is purely coincidental.)

Focus Pocus

Marty was smoking in front of the building when I arrived for work the next day. He had been off the painkillers for a little over a month.  I asked him how he was doing.

He said, “I can’t believe how lucky I am my wife stayed with me all this time.  Most of the time she’s a real sweetheart. She’s still a beaut, and I’m like a kid again, chasing the wife around the house. You know what I mean? Just yesterday she was coming out of the shower…”

I knew what he meant, but didn’t really want to hear the details. I interrupted him, “Sounds great.  Why don’t you look happier?”

“Don’t get me wrong, I love her.  Lately though, I’m really noticing things, things I didn’t see when I was taking all them pills.  She’s a control freak.  She’s a miserable tipper. She’s got a touch of COD. Don’t know why I couldn’t see that before.”

“I think you mean OCD,” I said.  “And listen, we see things with our eyes, but our mind processes what we see like a camera. With a camera, when one thing’s in focus, something else is out of focus.  When you were abusing opiates, you saw clearly you needed to get your drug every day.  The rest of your life was out of focus.  Now you’re focused on your wife.  Seeing her clearly, for ‘better or worse’ so to speak, gives you a chance to fix what’s broken and enjoy what’s not.”

Today I will be grateful for focus and clarity, even when I don’t like everything I see.

Life on Life’s Terms II © 2015 by Ken Montrose

(Just a reminder: LOLT II is a work of fiction.  Any resemblance to anyone you might know is purely coincidental.)

Circling the Cheetah Cage

Since Sam hadn’t been offended when I asked him about being grounded, I pushed my luck a little. “What’s up with Suzanne?”

Without hesitation he asked me, “Have you been to the zoo lately?  The animals live in enclosures with trees, rocks, and streams. It gives them the illusion of living free in the wild.  If they were born in the zoo, they may not even know they’re confined.  My siblings have jobs, loves, nice houses, expensive cars.  These things make them think they’re free of addiction, either their addiction, or a loved one’s addiction, or their addiction to an addicted loved one. Because they grew up surrounded by addictions, they don’t even know they’re confined. 

“Suzanne is starting to realize she’s been penned up by my family’s many, many addictions.  She’s stepped outside the enclosure, but she’s not really free yet.”

“Why not?” I asked, thinking I was missing something.

“Being outside the enclosure isn’t really being free. Picture a cheetah standing next to an open cage on a vast plain.   If the cheetah does nothing but pace around the cage, he’s not really free, in fact, he’s not really being a cheetah.  When he takes off running, when he explores the plain, when he puts miles between himself and the cage, he’s free, he’s a genuine cheetah.  Suzanne won’t be free until she stops circling the cage. She’s gotta go on vacation, have a baby, take that job in Columbus, and stop letting our family drama keep her from living her life.”

After he left, I thought about what he’d said.  Clearly, addiction wasn’t the only cage.  Fear, guilt, anger, our pasts, misinformation, ignorance confined many of us.  I resolved to identify my ‘cages’ and not to be limited by any of them.

Today I will explore the world, I won’t circle the cage.

Life on Life’s Terms II © 2015 by Ken Montrose

(Just a reminder: LOLT II is a work of fiction.  Any resemblance to anyone you might know is purely coincidental.)

Heroin, Oxycontin, & Other Opiates: Breaking your addiction to them

 "There is a 'carrot and stick' to opiates. Imagine a jackass chasing a carrot dangled in front of him on a stick. The animal will chase that carrot until he is exhausted, remembering the taste of the first carrot.

"Now imagine that his master finally allows him to eat the carrot in the shade. The carrot only satisfies his hunger for a few minutes. In what seems like a moment, his master will be hitting him with a stick to get him moving again. Soon his belly is rumbling, his sides hurt from the stick, and he knows he must get up to chase another carrot.

"Opiates are the carrot and the stick. The high, and the escape from pain, are the carrot. Withdrawal and all the problems opiate addiction causes are the stick. Addiction is the master. Guess which role you play. This workbook will help you stop." ( p. 1)

Heroin, Oxycontin, & Other Opiates: Breaking your addiction to them (c) 2005 by Ken Montrose  

The ebook version is available free of charge from May 11th through May 1th at:  http://www.amazon.com/Ken-Montrose/e/B001K8MG0S

Sick, Healing, Learning

After the game, I had a chance to talk with Sam, the family outcast. Even though he was the manager of a local restaurant, his family called him ‘the dumb waiter.’  They laughed at the idea he would ever support himself with his writing.  His refusal to help pay his oldest sister’s gambling debts had branded him a disloyal, selfish, ingrate in their eyes.

The more I talked with him, the more impressed I became.  Sam truly loved his nephew, and worried about Chad’s future.  He didn't seem to take himself too seriously, but put his heart and soul into his job and his writing.

It took me awhile to ask him, but I finally blurted out, “How’d you end up so grounded?” I feared he’d be offended, but he just laughed.

“I've always been a little out of step, a little apart from people.  I’m not a loner, but I like to observe more than interact with people.  Watching my family from within my family showed me just who I didn't want to be.  Did Mikey tell you about us?   My mom is the queen of all drama queens, my dad’s a martyr, except for Suzanne and me everybody’s addicted to something, and my sister Doc keeps a lid on the whole mess with Xanax and Valium.”

He took shook his head and added, “Even though we’re as sick as we can be, we look like the All-American family to the outside world.  Because we’re so good at pretending, I never believe other people are who they seem to be.  My last two relationships ended because I couldn't trust them, they were too good to be true.”  He smiled, but shook his head again.  “I’m sick, but I’m learning.”

Today I will be inspired by people scarred, but still healing, still learning.

Life on Life’s Terms II © 2015 by Ken Montrose

(Just a reminder: LOLT II is a work of fiction.  Any resemblance to anyone you might know is purely coincidental.)

Silencer

“He won’t make ‘em!” one of the other team’s fans yelled, as Chad bounced the ball, getting ready to shoot.

Chad’s first shot rolled around the rim and fell in.  His second went straight through the rim, hitting nothing but net.

“Oh, made ‘em both,” one of our boys yelled, clearly for the benefit of that obnoxious fan. “That’s right, meet the Maker!” The other team’s fans fell silent.

We won by two.  Chad picked up the tab “Maker,” a nickname any ballplayer would love to have.

Today I will be grateful for whatever silences people with nothing good to say.

Life on Life’s Terms II © 2015 by Ken Montrose

(Just a reminder: LOLT II is a work of fiction.  Any resemblance to anyone you might know is purely coincidental.)

A nice surpise

As the boys walked to the bench, KC called out, “Chad, you shoot ‘em.”

Chad nodded, a look of grim determination on his face. 

I had seen Chad’s parents, Betsy and Bob, walk into the gym before the start of the game.  I had expected them to confront KC and me for sneaking Chad into practices. They hadn't, and I hadn't noticed the rest of Chad’s family walking in behind them.  His grandmother, who used threats of suicide to manipulate the family sat next to his grandfather.  Chad’s grandfather called his wife “Bluffy the Empire Slayer” because he was convinced dealing with her threats had kept him from building up a successful business. 

Chad’s uncles filled the row behind his grandparents.  Paul had torn himself away from his basement porn palace to attend.  To his left sat Chad’s twin uncles, Matt and Mark, who abused pills prescribed to them by ‘Doc,’ their younger sister, a psychiatrist. 

I was only surprised they had gotten the whole dysfunctional family together for a basketball.  I was stunned the youngest of the brothers, Sam, came with them.  He was somewhat estranged from the family because he refused to support his oldest sister Betsy’s gambling addiction.

Doc wasn't there, but Chad’s aunt Suzanne sat with her husband Mikey, my gym buddy.

Chad turned to look at his family.  I could see his anxiety from twenty feet away.  His father must have seen it too.

 “Love you buddy,” Bob yelled.  Maybe Bob was drunk, but he said the right thing at the right time.  Chad smiled, some of the anxiety draining from his face.  Bob quieted all but one idiot in the crowd.

Today I will be grateful when people do the right thing, especially if I never expected them to. 

Life on Life’s Terms II © 2015 by Ken Montrose

(Just a reminder: LOLT II is a work of fiction.  Any resemblance to anyone you might know is purely coincidental.)

Only human

Two days later our basketball team had its first close game. With the score tied and less than a minute on the clock, we inbounded the ball under their basket.  Salt was supposed to throw the ball to Pepper, but Pepper was double teamed.  He looked directly at Pepper, but passed the ball to Hardwork at the foul line.  One of their defenders jumped Hardwork, knocking the ball out of his hands. It looked like the ball might have bounced off of Hardwork’s sneaker. The ball rolled out of bounds, and the referee gave us the ball on the sidelines.

Their coach, forgetting this was a sixth grade church league, went berserk.  He insisted Hardwork had touched the ball last, the referee was blind, and his dog could call a better game.  This didn’t faze the ref, which further infuriated their coach.  He became more and more abusive until finally he was charged with a technical foul, and our team awarded two free throws.

KC shook his head, “All he had to do was remember the ref’s are human, and set up his defense.  Now we get two shots and the ball back.  Who do you think should shoot the free throws?”

“Chad,” I said without hesitation.

Today I will remember we’re all only human.

Life on Life’s Terms II © 2015 by Ken Montrose

(Just a reminder: LOLT II is a work of fiction.  Any resemblance to anyone you might know is purely coincidental.)

Say What?

That night I was sitting on the couch, reading an article online.  Blondie plopped down beside me and opened her History book.  I kissed the top of her head and went back to reading.  I was only half listening to what she said.  Processing what I thought I heard took a long second.

“Have you lost your #$%$# mind?” I demanded.  “You haven’t finished high school!  What about college?  What about your future?  Have you noticed your mother and I both work?  Who’s gonna help you raise the baby?”

Her blank stare told me I hadn’t heard her correctly.

“I said you’re going to be a wonderful grandfather, someday,” she stated, pronouncing each syllable clearly, and rolling her eyes. “Not soon, but someday.”

“Oh, well that’s different.  Thanks.”

“Oh, but you’re different,” she muttered, poking me in the ribs.

Today I won’t react until I’m sure I heard what I thought I heard.

Life on Life’s Terms II © 2015 by Ken Montrose

(Just a reminder: LOLT II is a work of fiction.  Any resemblance to anyone you might know is purely coincidental.)

Safety Test

The group moved on to a new topic.  Benjamin, a young man struggling with multiple addictions had gone to a bar over the weekend, but was proud he hadn't gotten drunk.

“I just wanted to test my recovery, see if I could be around alcohol,” Benjamin said.  “Didn't drink, so I’m feeling like I passed a kinda safety test to be in bars.”

“Why are you testing your recovery?” I asked.  “What are you hoping to gain?  I want the car company to test  airbags because they could save my life.  I don’t want to test my sobriety because it won’t make me safer.  If I ‘prove’ I can be around alcohol without drinking, being around alcohol becomes more acceptable to me.  The more I’m around it, the less of an impulse I need to drink. My recovery becomes less safe from testing.”

“Besides, you tested your sobriety by meeting your bookie at a strip club,” Marty, an older man struggling with an addiction to painkillers, said to Benjamin.”

“I’m not addicted to gambling or women,” Benjamin insisted.  “No test needed.”

“At twenty-eight you’re already twice divorced and about to lose your girlfriend, partly because you tested her tolerance for your shenanigans.  Do I need to mention your gambling has you in debt up to your eyeballs?” his friend Martin asked.   “Love ya’ kid, but you already failed all them tests.”

“Speaking of tests,” I said, “The Other Ken scheduled surprise drug screens today.” Several group members looked panicked, and informed me they had been drug screened earlier in the week. 

Today I’ll remember there’s no safe way to test an addiction, a marriage, or a relationship.

 Life on Life’s Terms II © 2015 by Ken Montrose

(Just a reminder: LOLT II is a work of fiction.  Any resemblance to anyone you might know is purely coincidental.)