What’s Up Doc?

I know what you’re saying,” Bob said.  “My family needs to stop doing the sketchy stuff that gets us into trouble. If you help Doc get out of this mess, we can start cleaning up our act.”

He wasn’t getting it. “Forget the roller coaster and the train,” I said.  “Did you ever watch the old Bugs Bunny cartoons? In one of them Bugs is on a plane that’s about to crash.  Just before the plane hits the ground, he steps out.  The plane crumples into a twisted heap of metal.  He walks away unharmed.

“In real life you can’t just step out.  Your body is moving as fast as the plane.  You’d hit the ground at the speed the plane was traveling.  Getting Doc out of trouble would be like helping her step out of a nose-diving plane.  The case against her might crash and burn, but she really wouldn’t walk away unharmed.  She’d be more convinced than ever she was managing her family’s addictions, and that everything was under control.”

“So you’ll help her with the licensing board?” Bob asked. 

I stared at the phone, amazed at how disconnected from reality he was.  ‘Drink enough booze, do enough drugs, and life takes on a cartoonish quality,’ I thought. “Can’t,” was all I said.

Today I will live in the real world.

Life on Life’s Terms II © 2015 by Ken Montrose

(Just a reminder: LOLT II is a work of fiction.  Any resemblance to anyone you might know is purely coincidental.)