Fawlty Showers 2

Credit Card

After dinner Blondie gave me back my credit card she’d used to pay for a cake.

Blondie said, “If there’s expensive stuff on the bill, Brat Boy probably got the card out of my wallet.”

She was joking.  Blondie was a responsible adult who didn’t run up huge credit card bills.  She got me thinking about how getting drunk was like handing your credit card to a childish version of yourself. Instead of charging things a child might like, you did adult things you’d have to pay for later.

Problem drinkers ran up the bill with beer muscles, wearing beer goggles. They drove drunk, had ill-advised sexual encounters with other problem drinkers, embarrassing themselves and hurting loved ones. Sometimes they just rusted away, wasting their time, poisoning their relationships.

“Not gonna give that card to that drunken version of me,” I said. “Not today.”

Blondie looked puzzled, then laughed and  said, “You’re talking to yourself again, Dad.”

 

Today I’ll be careful who I hand my credit card to.

 

Fawlty Showers II is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•             www.greenbriartraining.com 

•             https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

•             https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/

 

 

Fawlty Showers 2

The Specific Ocean

“Anything special going on tomorrow?” Dr. Deb asked, a lilt to her voice.

I said, “Brat Boy’s coming over to watch the NBA playoffs.” Brat Boy was coming over, but to help us celebrate. Blondie was making dinner. “Oh, and I think it might be our anniversary.”

“Still love me after all these years?”

I was going to say ‘I love you’ and leave it at that, but instead I decided to be specific.

I said, “You met me at my worst and still found a reason to love me.  You loved my parents, and made them feel special every time they came here.  There’s so much I admire about you. Our children couldn’t have asked for a better mother. I love your sense of humor. I love your company, I’m so glad you’re a homebody like me.”

The list went on.  When I was done, Dr. Deb asked, “Is that all?” wiping a tear away.

“Well I didn’t want to seem shallow, but it doesn’t hurt that you’re smokin’ hot.”

She laughed, “It’s okay to be a little shallow.”

Today I’ll be specific when I tell someone I love them.

 

Fawlty Showers II is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•             www.greenbriartraining.com 

•             https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

•             https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/

Fawlty Showers 2

Granted

When I got home, Dr. Deb was in the kitchen, making her lunch for the next day. I hugged her tight, holding her a long moment, and then another.

“Sad meeting?” she asked.

“Not really,” I said.

“Feeling guilty about something?”

“Wouldn’t admit it if I was.”

Dr. Deb said, “Weasel. Are you just letting me know you love me?”

I shrugged. “Eh, maybe, I guess you’re alright.”

She poked me in the chest with two fingers. I laughed.

“I wanted to let you know I never take you for granted,” I said. She hugged me. “Thought I’d tell you when times were good. I didn’t want you to think I was just saying it because I needed something.”

“Like my forgiveness for whatever you’re feeling guilty about?” she said, pretending to be suspicious.

I snorted and smiled. “You got me. The body’s buried in back. I need you to tell the police I was with you all night.”

Today I make sure someone knows I don’t take them for granted.

 

Fawlty Showers II is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•             www.greenbriartraining.com 

•             https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

•             https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/

Fawlty Showers

Emotional Addictions

At the end of the meeting I got in line to thank the speaker.  She told me she’d gotten sober at Greenbriar. She had been furious with herself and the world when she had landed in rehab.

“You warned me that rage could become an addiction,” she said, looking away. “It’s mood altering, energizing, and takes the place of depression.”

“People get out of your way, or give you what you want to avoid dealing with you,” I added. “You pay the price when people start to avoid you.”

“I discovered there were other addictive emotions,” she said. “After I left rehab, I started having success, but I could only enjoy it for a short time before I had to have more.”

“What happened?”

“I crashed. Lost a business and a husband.  Add self-pity to the list of addictive emotions. Finally I learned to slow down and enjoy the positive, not wallow in the negative.”

Slow down to enjoy the positive don’t wallow in the negative. Good advice, I thought.

Today I’ll beware of emotional addictions, slowing down to enjoy the positive, not wallowing in the negative.

 

 Fawlty Showers II is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•             www.greenbriartraining.com 

•             https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

•             https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/

 

Fawlty Showers

 

Stanley

“How’s that hot wife of yours?” Stanley asked.  “She ever ask about me?”

I laughed. “Never.  Not once. I think you’re in her ‘met you, forget you’ file.”

“Well, does she smile when she sees you?” 

“Sure, why?”

“Then she’s probably seeing you, but fantasizing that it’s me.”

“A 90 year old toothpick in a velour track suit right out of the 70s. You’re every woman’s dream,” I said, smiling. Stanley laughed.

He paused for a moment, then in a serious tone asked, “How you two doin’? You taking care of yourselves? You’re not my age, but you aren’t getting any younger.”

For all his bluster and sarcasm, Stanley was one of those people looking out for other people.  We need more Stanleys, I thought.

 

Today I’ll be grateful for people looking out for other people.

 

Fawlty Showers II is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•             www.greenbriartraining.com 

•             https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

•             https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/

Fawlty Showers

Whatever Works

Talmadge and Stanley were sitting in the back when I got to the AA meeting that night.  They reminded me of the two old guys in the balcony on the Muppet Show. 

Stanley had retired early from the steel mills, just before they closed. He worked a variety of jobs until social security kicked in. After that he worked under the table into his mid-70s.

Talmadge had been a CPA. He retired on his 67^th birthday, clocking out at 12:17 p.m., precisely the time he was born. 

They met fishing from shore, yelling snarky comments at boaters slowing down in the no wake zone.  Soon they were meeting every Saturday, sharing a cooler of beer, feeding the sandwiches Talmadge’s wife had made to the ducks.

Sometimes the Universe is in sync. Both developed health problems and struggled to quit. Talmadge went to AA first and convinced his friend Stanley to try it.

They were an odd pair, the chubby, black, retired executive and the pale, rail thin, former steelworker. Fishing, drinking, and sarcasm had brought them together, but recovery had cemented their friendship.

“Whatever works,” I said to myself.

 

Today I’ll be grateful for whatever binds us together.

 

Fawlty Showers II is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•             www.greenbriartraining.com 

•             https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

•             https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/
 

Fawlty Showers 2

Admitted

“The second word in the first step is admitted,” I said. “I tell people admitting without committing is just shitting yourself.”  Silence. “C’mon, it rhymes!” Eye rolls.

“Okay,” I continued. “Saying you have a problem is technically admitting, but to show you accept your situation you have to commit to change. Examples?”

“You admit you’re an alcoholic and get all the booze out of your house,” a guy named Roger said shaking his head. “Oh, the top-shelf stuff my wife poured down the drain.  I could cry.”

“You admit it’s time to commit. So you sell your motorcycles, put a down payment on a house, propose, and go to rehab when you find out your girlfriend is pregnant,” a young man said.

“You admit you need more exercise,” a thirty-something woman said. “So you adopt a big dog that will shred your couch if he isn’t walked three times a day.”

 

Today I will admit I need to change by committing to that change.

 

Fawlty Showers II is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•             www.greenbriartraining.com 

•             https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

•             https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/

 

Fawlty Showers II 

We

I stayed retired for two months. Randy called and asked if I could do run some groups on a part-time basis.  In three months I was working half-days. Complete retirement had left me restless, never a good thing for someone in recovery.

My first half-day back I led a group on Twelve Step recovery.

I said, “The first word of the first step is ‘we.’  You replace the we – the people, places, and things – of addiction with something better, the ‘we’ of your recovery.”  Anybody think of ways replacing one ‘we’ for another applies to your life?”

“If you feel empty, you better find something other than booze to fill your life,” an older guy said, staring at his shoes. His wife had left him years ago and his kids were moving away.

“Exactly,” I said. “How about other aspects of your life?”

“If you develop diabetes, and you want to eat healthy, you better learn some new recipes,” a woman added.

“If you want to get in shape, you ought to try different kinds of exercise until you find one you like.”

“Women are like buses,” a middle-aged man said, “If one leaves you on the curb, you just catch the next one.”  I made a note to meet with him individually.

Today I will find a healthier ‘we’.

  

Fawlty Showers II is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•             www.greenbriartraining.com 

•             https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

•             https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/

 Fawlty Showers

Hoping All The Dads Have A Happy Fathers Day! 

(M.A.'s father was a bit of a weasel, but that's another story...)

 Fawlty Showers

Too Soon?

On my last day of work a young man knocked on my door. He was thinking of leaving the rehab.

“You’re here,” I said. “You’ve taken the first step. Why would you want to go back?”

“I don’t know,” he said, “is it too soon? I’m only twenty.”

“Tell me why you came here.”

His life was a mess. His parents were raising his four-year-old son. The child’s mother had died of an overdose. He’d spent two years in the college dorms running up his student loans and selling drugs. His attorney was trying to plea down to a misdemeanor, but he was likely to end up convicted of a felony.

“It’s never too soon,” I said.  “It’s not so much change gets harder later on, it’s just there’s more of mess to clean up, less time to enjoy having your house in order.”

 

Today is not too soon to make a change.

 

Fawlty Showers is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•             www.greenbriartraining.com 

•             https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

•             https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/

Fawlty Showers

It’s Never Too Late

Dana finished her degree. Randy hired her the next day.

“I thought I was a little old to be starting a new career,” Dana said. “I’m glad now I made the switch.”

“You were what, fifty-five, fifty-six, when you started your internship?” I suggested.

Dana punched me and said, “I was forty-two!”

Katy said, “My brother joined the military thinking that was going to be his lifelong career.  He got out in twenty and opened a restaurant. He loves it.”

“My uncle lost his wife when he was forty, remarried at eighty, and died at ninety,” Randy said.  “Claimed the last ten years of his life were the happiest.”

“Aww, that’s so sweet,” Dana said.

Katy put her hand over her heart and smiled. “Touching.”

“Well, he was really rich and  his second wife was 18 when they met,” Randy said. “We don’t know that she poisoned him, but...”

I laughed until coffee came out of my nose.  “Seriously though, you see people all the time getting sober later in life,” I said. “Never met one who regretted it.”

 

Today is not too late to make a change.

 

Fawlty Showers is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•             www.greenbriartraining.com 

•             https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

•             https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/

 

 Fawlty Showers

Influence

Semi-Colin let MA into the backyard when they buried Cuddles.  The next day they found a small pile of Gummi Bears on the grave. MA had sneaked out during the night, braving stray cats, foxes, and other creatures, to honor his friend.

Semi-Colin and Dash wrote a picture book “The Brave Little Ferret.” They sold it online and donated the money to the animal shelter. 

Our influence outlives us, and ripples through time.  Cuddles’ bond with MA had emboldened him, in turn inspiring Semi-Colin and Dash.

As Fathers’ Day approached that year, I smiled thinking of the ways my father’s kind soul had left its mark on my children. My heart sank remembering a friend who’d never learned to trust men because of her father’s deceitful ways.

I reminded myself that my influence was likely to last long after I was gone.

Today I will try to be a good influence.

Fawlty Showers is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•             www.greenbriartraining.com 

•             https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

•             https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/

 Fawlty Showers

Inspirational

Cuddles continued to visit for four more years. His health declined and he stopped making the trip from Semi-Colin’s to the rehab. Eventually his kidneys failed and he was in pain.

I went with Semi-Colin to the vet to have him put down.  Cuddles took one more swipe at the doc. For a second it looked like he was smiling.

To my surprise, I was inspired by Cuddles. He’d made the transition from badass alley cat to beloved pet. Cuddles had looked out for his friends. He’d brought joy to Fawlty Showers and to Semi-Colin’s family. A smile on his face, he’d gone out swinging.  

“For a cat you were quite the inspiration,” I said softly, wondering if I was missing other sources of motivation.

Today I’ll open my eyes to Life’s inspiration.

 

Fawlty Showers is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•             www.greenbriartraining.com 

•             https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

•             https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/

Fawlty Showers

The Right Thing

The next day Abigail and Dana were standing at Katy’s desk in the reception area. 

“Why does everybody look so sad?” I asked.

Dana said, “Even though that witch from the county got canned, we know we can’t bring MA and Cuddles back.”

“MA and Cuddles had a good life here,” Katy said, “But your friend’s little boy adores them.  I’m sure he plays with them constantly.”

Abigail almost smiled and said, “MA isn’t so chubby anymore. I believe he’s getting more exercise.”

“Ain’t always easy doing the right thing,” I said. “But at least we get to visit.”

Today I’ll do the right thing even if it’s painful.

Fawlty Showers is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•             www.greenbriartraining.com 

•             https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

•             https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/

 

 Fawlty Showers

Life Can Be Fair

I texted Brat Boy, ‘The word of the day is comeuppance.’

Brat Boy texted back, ‘HA! I know what it means, getting what’s coming to you! Blondie served up some comeuppance on that guy!’

Later I thought of all the times I’d been told life was unfair. While true, sometimes life could be fair and just, such as when people like Paltry got caught.

“We overlook the times life is fair and rewarding,” I said to the TV. “Like when two good people find each other. Hard work pays off. An innocent animal who wants nothing more than to be loved is adopted. Time, money, and effort spent on research yields a cure.”

 I wrote a list of other things in life that seemed fair and rewarding.

 

Today I’ll be grateful life can be fair.

 

Fawlty Showers is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•             www.greenbriartraining.com 

•             https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

•             https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/

 

Fawlty Showers

Underestimate

That night I tuned into my daughter’s press conference.  Blondie was working with local business leaders and politicians to repurpose buildings left empty as people continued working from home after the pandemic.

One politician, an arrogant little weasel named Paltry, had been a thorn in Blondie’s side, dismissing her ideas, calling her honey, and generally treating her as hired help.

Paltry had underestimated Blondie. He’d made an enemy without really knowing who or what he was dealing with.

Underestimating an enemy was never a good idea. It was how people relapsed, underestimating the pull of their addictions. It was how people returned to bad relationships, underestimating their attraction to someone toxic.

 Trying a new drug was like making a new enemy – once you tangled with it or them, getting untangled wasn’t always easy.

Blondie stepped to the mic. Instead of discussing the progress of the project, she announced she had evidence Paltry was getting kickbacks from contractors.

Blondie didn’t actually drop the mic, but her smile had the same effect.

 

Today I won’t underestimate my enemy.

 

Fawlty Showers is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•             www.greenbriartraining.com 

•             https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

•             https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/

Fawlty Showers

 

Only Human

The county evaluator got fired. Apparently making us get rid of the animals was the tip of the iceberg.

Katy told me the news with a big smile on her face.

“We shouldn’t be happy about this,” she said.

“We should not,” I agreed, as I fought to hide my smirk. “She has issues.  She might have trouble finding another job.”

I spent the afternoon happy, but shoulding on myself.

‘I shouldn’t be this glad,’ my conscience said.

‘I hope the only job she can find is poop girl at the local animal shelter,’ the rest of my mind answered.

I finally decided to stop shoulding on myself. I was only human, sometimes giving into pettiness, resentment, and all the other flaws that came from living with other imperfect people.

“I hope she learns from this,” I said to myself. It was the only kind thing I could think of at the time.

 

Today I will accept I’m only human.

 

Fawlty Showers is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•             www.greenbriartraining.com 

•             https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

•             https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/

Fawlty Showers

 

Epiphany Chaser

I ran into Tiffany at the gym.  I called her Epiphany. She was always looking for that ‘a ha’ moment where she’d understand why she drank and learn to control it.

Epiphany sat down next to me on the stationary bikes.  I took out my ear buds. She told me what her therapists had said.

“You’d be better off seeing one professional at a time,” I suggested.

She shook her head. “I got a hypnotist too,” she said, “to look for forgotten trauma in my past.”

Epiphany took a sip of water and added, “The astrologer says we Leos are drawn to the restless spirits of life’s vineyards. Whaddya think?” You like wine and whiny men, I thought.

“You know what I think.  It’s obvious you have a serious drinking problem. Whatever the reason for it, you are slipping into the middle stages of addiction. If you don’t accept the obvious, you’re going to trip over it, maybe get hurt in the fall.”

I put my earbuds back in, but I couldn’t help but remember the times I’d tripped over the obvious.

 

Today I’ll try to accept reality and not to trip over the obvious.

Fawlty Showers is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•             www.greenbriartraining.com 

•             https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

•             https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/

Fawlty Showers

Carrot and Stick

“How does your husband deal with your daughter’s boyfriend?” I asked later.

Dana said, “Carrot and the stick.  He got Dimwit, The Princess’s boyfriend, a good job cleaning up construction sites. Holding onto that job is the carrot.”

“What’s the stick?” I asked.

“He told Dimwit he knows a couple of shady bricklayers who owe him favors.  They’d be happy to hide a body behind a brick wall if he asked.”

 “I met your husband,” I said. “He’s a really nice guy. He’d never do something like that.”

“You know that, and I know that. Dimwit can’t be sure.”

I thought for a moment. “It takes both sometimes. I quit drinking because I got tired of beating myself with the stick. I stayed sober because of the carrot – seeing how much better life could be.”

‘Gotta love the carrot and the stick. ‘Course I’d like to beat Dimwit with a stick while he choked on a carrot, but that’s another story.”

 

Today I’ll try to be grateful when I’m motivated by both the carrot and the stick.

 

Fawlty Showers is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

·         www.greenbriartraining.com 

·         https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/
 

 Fawlty Showers

Out of Sight…

Just then Cuddles showed up, a semi-dead mouse in his mouth. He dropped it at Dana’s feet. The mouse dragged itself away, hiding under the vending machine as Dana, Cuddles, and I watched.

“We really should do something about that mouse,” Dana said. “It might die under there. The whole break room will smell.”

“Good point,” I said. Neither of us moved. Cuddles strolled away, no doubt pleased with himself.

“Stupid cat.”

We finished our lunches. The mouse was out of sight, but likely dying under the vending machine.

“Sometimes the elephant isn’t in the room, he’s hiding in the basement,” I said.

Dana knew what I meant, “It’s easy to ignore hidden problems until something dies, like a business or a relationship. My father literally drank in the basement. My mother ignored it until he died of liver failure.”

I sighed. “Let’s get the mouse.”

“Stupid cat,” Dana said again.

 

Today I won’t ignore the hidden problems.

 

Fawlty Showers is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

·         www.greenbriartraining.com 

·         https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/

Fawlty Showers

Good Influence

Dana and I were having lunch in the break room when she said, “Do you notice how Colin and Beth have gotten Abigail to lighten up?”

“Never sure how she worked that magic, or what they have in common,” I said, “but Abigail is a different person when she’s around Beth.”

“Some people change because of something they’ve read,” Dana said, “but I think most people change because of someone else’s influence.”

“I gotta be grateful for the people who’ve had a positive influence on me.”

“I’m grateful for the Pennsylvania State Legislature. They’ve given me hope.  They wrote a law that says when The Princess turns 18, I’m no longer responsible for her upkeep.”

I laughed, but Dana only smiled over her coffee cup.

Today I’ll be grateful for the people who’ve had a positive influence on me.

 

Fawlty Showers is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

·         www.greenbriartraining.com 

·         https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/
 

 Fawlty Showers

Flowers & Sidewalks

Over the next several weeks a flower grew in the cracks of the sidewalk. No actual flower blossomed, but something good sprang from a bad situation.

Cuddles the cat continued to visit, but we all missed Moondoggy Alpha the ferret.  Semi-Colin told me our staff was welcome to visit him.

Dana and her son took him up on his offer.  Whenever they came over, Beth and Semi-Colin were able to relax a little. Sometimes they’d go shopping or to a movie while Dana watched the boys play with the animals.

Dana’s son Darren was a good kid, but playing with the younger Dash brought out the best in him.  Watching them together took Dana’s mind off the never ending drama that was her daughter The Princess.

Hearing Dana talk about her visits made me think of the good things that had come from bad situations in my life, of the flowers that had grown in the cracks in the sidewalk.

 

Today I’ll be grateful for the flower that grows between the cracks in the sidewalk.

 

Fawlty Showers is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

·         www.greenbriartraining.com 

·         https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

https://www.pinterest.com/kenmontrose/mt-rose/