FAWLTY SHOWERS 2

 

Vampire Slayer

“My life is like a reverse vampire movie,” a woman in the afternoon group said.

“How so?” I asked.

“In vampire movies they just have to make it through the night somehow. Daylight comes. They breathe a sigh of relief and figure out how they’re going to be safe the next night.”

“You just have to get through the day, not the night, somehow,” the man sitting next to her said.

She nodded, “And like the movies, each day I get better at dealing with whatever is trying to suck the life out of me.”

“Until you become a vampire slayer,” the man said, “meeting head-on whatever life throws at you.”

 

Today I’ll live my life like a vampire slayer.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

Believing One’s Own Cow Excrement

That Friday was the start of a long holiday weekend. Predictably, several people signed themselves out of treatment against medical advice.

One man was honest about his reason for leaving. “I just want one more blowout weekend. I’ll get sober after that.”

“No, I really am just going to see my uncle,” another man said. “It’s not about drinking.” His body language and tone told me he didn’t really believe it.

Working in the Alumni Office in college, a wealthy alum had given me a piece of advice about success.

“Never believe your own bullshit about what you’re going to do or why,” he had said. “Too many bad, lazy, stupid, ideas come wrapped in self-deception.”

That vey night I had told myself I was going to the bar for a beer and sandwich, knowing deep down I was going to get wasted.

I said to the man leaving treatment, “I can’t stop you from going, but if you do relapse, will you stop lying to yourself?

He laughed and said he’d be back. We never saw him again.

 

Today I’ll be honest with myself.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible
 

Fawlty Showers 2

Forgivens

The next morning, I presented a training on forgiveness in recovery. My audience was mostly treatment professionals, but much of the discussion was about their personal lives.

One thing we talked about was how much easier it was to polish a resentment than to forgive someone.  

To be certain, there were times when forgiving was much easier said than done, especially if the person asking for forgiveness was likely to wrong us again.

Still, I wondered if it wouldn’t do me some good to take a long look at the times I’d been forgiven, to polish my forgivens.

 

Today I will polish my ‘forgivens’.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

 

Fawlty Showers 2

Falling, Mumbling, Bunny

The Detox Nurse came over from the dorm building to assess the man. 

After she took his vitals, she asked if he could walk next door with her.

He mumbled, “Can’t walk so good. Best I can do is fall forward.”

The man and I laughed. The nurse rolled her eyes, but smiled. I helped her get him to Detox.

When I got back to my office I thought about what the man had said.

I told DD the bunny, “Some days I can take long strides in the right direction. Some days the best I can do is fall forward. As long as I’m moving in the right direction, it’s all good.”

 

Today I’ll at least fall forward.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

 

Fawlty Showers 2

 

Out of Habit

As I guided the man back to the waiting room, it struck me. He had remembered to wash his hands.

Somebody had taught him to do so and the habit had stuck, even when he was half dead, coming off a bender.

I mentally made a list of all the good habits I’d been taught over the years, grateful for the people who taught me.

My first thought was of my dad. He’d taught me by example to always make sure the people you loved knew it.

 

Today I’ll be grateful for good habits and the people who taught them to me.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

Fawlty Showers 2

 

It’s Not Automatic

After the phone call I went to the Men’s Room.

A young man waiting for detox stood with his hands under the soap dispenser.

No soap came out.

“It’s not the automatic kind,” I said. “You have to push the lever.”

He stared at me, then back at the dispenser, then back at me again. One of his eyes was half open.

“Life is like a soap dispenser,” I said, sharing my wisdom with this semi-conscious man, the sink, and the urinals. “Most times you have to push a little to get things started.”

The man pushed the lever, nearly falling over from the effort.

“Most times you have to push yourself.”

 

Today I will push a little to get something started.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

Fawlty Showers 2

 

Horses, Pack Mules, Jackasses

Margaret went back to complaining about her ex.

“Don’t mistake your horse for a pack mule,” I said.

“You get weirder every day. What does that mean?” she asked.

“Get back on the horse, but don’t load it down with all your anger, resentment, and frustration.”

“The horse is recovery?”

“The horse is anything you start over after things have gone badly; recovery, business, dating, whatever.”

“I’m getting back on the horse. I’ll try not to treat her like a pack mule. He’s still a jackass.”

“You’re doing it again,” I said.

 

Today I won’t treat the horse like a pack mule.

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

Fawlty Showers 2

DIY Nasal Surgery

Margaret the Newbie called right before lunch to talk about her relapse.

“My ex bought his newly graduated, newly pregnant, new girlfriend a car,” she said.  “He used to get mad when I ordered an expensive dinner.”

“And drinking changed everything,” I said, careful to keep the sarcasm out of my voice.

Margaret sighed. “It changed nothing. I was still full of resentment. I cut off my nose to spite my face.”

“The Surgeon General doesn’t recommend DIY nasal surgery.”

“I’m so stupid.”

“No, you’re not,” I said. “And you’re not alone. People hurt themselves all the time trying to get back at someone.”

“Never again,” Margaret said. I hoped so.

 

Today, no DIY nasal surgery.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible
 

Fawlty Showers 2

 

Cake and Loopholes

Dana dropped by my office with a big box from the bakery.

“What’s this?” I asked.

“Cake,” Dana said. “Husband is on a health kick. He thinks I’m poisoning you and me with our daily donut ritual.”

I laughed. “So, you promised you wouldn’t buy donuts today?”

“And I kept my promise because I’m a good wife.”

“He has a point. And this cake instead of donuts loophole won’t make us any healthier.”

“Do you want to talk about loopholes or eat cake?” Dana asked.

I shoveled a forkful into my mouth feeling my blood sugar surge and my arteries harden.

 

Today I won’t look for the loophole.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

Fawlty Showers 2

 

A Novel About Spanish Lawnmowers

When I got to work the next day, Abigail’s door was closed.

“Abigail call off?” I asked Katy at the reception desk. She motioned me closer.

“She broke up with the new girlfriend, but she doesn’t want to talk about it,” Katy said in whisper.

“That’s too bad.”

Katy shrugged. “She’s OK with it.  In fact, she’s happy she tried, and plans to try again.  Just doesn’t want to talk about it.”

Good for her, I thought. Maybe there’s something I should try again. 

I thought about going back to school, writing another novel, or learning Spanish. Decided I’d try again to fix my old lawnmower instead.

Today I won’t give up, I’ll try again.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

Fawlty Showers 2

 

Yappy

Dogs were allowed in the outside seating area of the diner.  Someone had brought what might have been Pomeranian-demon mix, that yapped at Mojo.

Mojo raised his head, stared at the little mutt with a look equal parts boredom and contempt, and went back to snoozing.

The little dog turned circles in frustration.

Talmadge reached down to pat Mojo. “Little dog reminds me of my son-in-law, always mad I won’t drink with him. I don’t even answer him anymore.”

“I’ve tried to stop arguing online,” I said. “I’m happier when I don’t.”

“I had to block my cousin,” Epiphany said. “I don’t think capybara are the chicken of the future, and I’m not investing in a giant rodent farm. Done arguing with her.”

 

Today I’ll try to avoid pointless arguments.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

Fawlty Showers 2

Credit Report

“Dammit!” Talmadge said, looking at his watch.

“Past your bedtime?” I asked.

“No, my watch is dead. I won’t get credit for the steps I took.”

That night I learned Talmadge wasn’t part of a group trying to lose weight.  He and his wife weren’t encouraging each other to walk more. Nobody but Talmadge and his watch knew how far he’d walked.

“Give yourself credit for the steps you took, even if you don’t know how many,” I said.

Talmadge and Epiphany Chaser rolled their eyes in unison. Clearly, I didn’t understand the whole watch thing.

What I did understand was the only credit you’re guaranteed is the credit you give yourself.

Today I’ll give myself credit.

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

 

Fawlty Showers 2

 Pie in the Sky

“Margaret relapsed,” Epiphany said, wiping away yet another tear. “What should we do?”

“We’ll do what we can to help her,” I said, “but first, pie.”

“Pie?”

“We’re still sober. We’re going to celebrate that, if only in a small way with pie.”

Epiphany smiled. “We can do both, worry about her and celebrate us.”

After the meeting. Talmadge, Epiphany, and I got pie from a local diner. We ate outside in the cool spring air. 

Afterward, we all texted Margaret to offer our support.

 

Today, pie.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

Fawlty Showers 2

 

Do They Make a Self-Absorbent Paper Towel?

Epiphany stroked Mojo, wiping away a tear.

 “My mother says that until Mojo I was completely self-absorbed, concerned about nothing and nobody but me.”

Epiphany wiped away another tear.

“Did you think I was self-absorbed?” she asked.  “Only thinking about myself?”

‘You were an endless narcissistic documentary on your own life, narrated in great detail by an annoyingly whiny voice,’ I thought.

“A little,” I said.  “But Mojo gave you some of that self/other balance. You take care of yourself, but also think about other things as well, including people and pets.”

Epiphany smiled. “Balance,” she said. She scratched behind Mojo’s ear. “Who’s a good doggie who gave mommy balance?”

 

Today I’ll find balance between taking care of myself and thinking of others.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

Fawlty Showers 2

Old Dogs, Something, and Nothing

That night I got to the AA meeting a little early.  The normally energetic Epiphany Chaser was sitting on the floor in the corner.  Mojo the elderly dog she’d adopted rested his head in her lap.

I started to sit down next to her, decided it might be too hard to get up, and pulled up a chair.

“Whatcha doing?” I asked.

“I’m doing nothing. Mojo taught me how. It’s the best thing I’ve done in a while.”

“Are you really doing nothing?”

Epiphany knew what I was getting at.

“I’m recharging my batteries. I’m resting my mind. I’m connecting with Mojo.”

“Sounds like a lot of healthy nothing.”

“It’s truly something,” Epiphany said with a big smile.

 

Today I’ll make time to do nothing, knowing it’s something.

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

 

Fawlty Showers 2

Bunny Bites

That afternoon Dipshit Dumbass the bunny arrived back at my door. Seems he bit the little boy.

I apologized to the boy’s father.

“It was a good lesson,” the man said with a shrug.  “You gave him a pet you obviously liked when my son needed him more.”

I almost sprained my arm patting myself on the back before remembering DD did bite the kid.

I thought I should have anticipated DD might not react well to the rough handling he was likely to get from a little boy.  I felt terrible about the boy having to give up the bunny.

“But, he did show me he could be responsible,” the father added. “I got him a puppy.”

A playful puppy wouldn’t mind being picked up, hugged, or chased.

I wasn’t happy the boy had been bitten, but he got a puppy and I got DD back.

After the man left, I said to DD, “Sometimes what looks like a setback is really a step in a better direction.”

 

Today I’ll remember what looks like a setback might be a step in a better direction.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible
 

Fawlty Showers 2

Glaciers and AA’s Promises

I passed Abigail’s office on my way to my own. Usually Abigail greeted me with a bare head nod, a disapproving look, or a complaint.

 On a good day I might get a half-hearted smile.

That day she smiled like she meant it.

Later, Randy told me his cousin’s new relationship was undoing the damage their aunt had done to Abigail’s psyche.

“Ken, have you ever watched a clip of a glacier melting?” Randy asked. “A little chunk here and there falls off, then a big chunk, then maybe another smaller one.”

“Abigail’s getting better, but the progress is uneven,” I guessed.

“Like they say in the Promises, ‘sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly.’”

 

Today I know progress, no matter how uneven, is still progress.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

 

Fawlty Showers 2

Deer: Cute and Evil

I almost hit a deer on my way to work.  While many people thought deer were cute, I knew the truth. “You’re a car wrecking, tick carrying, plant eating, vermin from the bowels of hell,” I said out loud.

I laughed at my overreaction to the deer, but my thoughts turned to how cuteness often hides danger.

The dessert ‘Death by Chocolate’ sounds funny and cute, unless you’re diabetic.

The evil ex may still look cute, but probably hasn’t become any less toxic.

The cartoon animals on the scratch-off ticket seem cute to the gambler, until she’s spent a paycheck on them.

Certain drinks can seem too cute be considered ‘real drinks’, even by someone with a drinking problem.  “It’s just orange juice and champagne.”

“Not going to be fooled by cuteness today,” I said as the deer wandered off the road, looking back with what I imagined was a sneer.

 

Today I’ll beware of danger wrapped in cuteness.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

 

Fawlty Showers 2

The Toaster Whisperer

I hadn’t heard Dr. Deb come downstairs.  I jumped when she asked, “Helping the toaster get over its bread addiction?”

“It’s not good to scare old people,” I said.

Dr. Deb laughed, hugged me from behind, and told me she loved me, even if I did talk to household appliances.

“You’re my kind of weird,” she said.

I didn’t mind being weird. Being sober in a drinking culture was weird, but had served me well.

I thought of other ways people were weird. For most people getting along with people they didn’t agree with was weird. Being optimistic online was becoming weirder by the day.  Some days common courtesy seemed weird.

I made up mind to be a little weird that day.

 

Today I’ll be a little weird.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible
 

Fawlty Showers 2

HALT
The next morning, I was glad I’d gone to bed on time.  I had a lot to do, and needed to be clear-headed.

“HALT,” I said to the toaster. “Don’t let yourself get too hungry, angry, lonely, or tired.”

My bagel popped up, and I added, “It makes you less likely to make poor decisions, like relapsing, or paying $10 for a cup of coffee.

 

Today I’ll remember HALT.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available from:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible

 

Fawlty Showers 2

 Predictions, Fjords, Serial Killers

That night I turned on the TV. Two programs caught my eye – a two season Viking saga and a six-part documentary on serial killers.

I told the voice in my head to shut up, lots of perfectly sane and nonviolent people were interested in Vikings and serial killers.

At about 8:00 I watched the longboats sail out of the fjord.

‘What happened last time you started a series at night?’ the voice asked.

“I had to watch one more episode until the wee hours of the morning,” I answered.

‘And you think this time will be different because…?’

I turned off the TV.

“I know,” I said to the voice, “if nothing changes, past behavior is the best predictor of future behavior.”

I thought about how that applied to eating, gambling, shopping, and so many other behaviors.

 

Today I’ll remember, if nothing changes, past behavior is the best predictor of future behavior.

 

Fawlty Showers 2 is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and anyone you might know is purely coincidental.

Other works by Ken Montrose are available at:

•                     www.greenbriartraining.com  

•                     https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8MG0S

 

#addictionawareness #dailymessage #inspiration #odaat #recoveryposse #recoveryispossible